Still with me?  OK… here goes.  In no particular order.

You think Hogan looks old here? This was in 2008!

Mandatory Retirement Age

Now before you get your panties in a bunch realize that I’m not talking about a literal “happy birthday, you’re fired” retirement age.  I’m talking about that point in time where the wrestling business has passed you by.  Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair & Sting… I’m looking directly at the three of you.  You guys are legends of the wrestling business.  In fact, you’re probably (arguably) 3 of the top 5 or 10 wrestlers of all time.  But it’s over.  Please go away.  Don’t step in the ring.  Father time has caught up with you and you simply cannot “bring it” any more.  If you want to stick around the business in some non-performer role I’ve got no problem with it, but your days cutting promos, blading and trying to hang with the young guys are over.

Specifically talking to Flair and Hogan here.  Guys, you’ve ruined your legacy.  Note that I didn’t say “you’re ruining your legacy.”  Nope… that would imply that there’s a chance of NOT ruining it.  You’re both well beyond that.  You’re not only shells of your former selves, but you’re downright embarrassing at this point.  I’m sorry to say it cause I’ve got nothing but respect for you, but you’re pathetic.

And before you think that this is only an anti-TNA rant the WWE has its share of guys that are WELL beyond their prime.  The Undertaker is my all time favorite wrestler… but hung on way too long (though he only works about 3-6 months a year).  Bret Hart keeps trying to roll his way to the ring.  Kevin Nash finds himself in the middle of the main program.  Fucking Jerry Lawler main evented a PPV last year and made his FIRST WrestleMania appearance.  I hate the term “youth movement” but in this case it’s necessary.

So much for that title lineage...

Less Titles That Mean More

Ever since WWE purchased WCW (and essentially ECW) there are just too damn many titles.  WWE has the WWE Championship, World Heavyweight Championship, US, Intercontinental, Tag Team, Divas, and pretty soon (in all likelihood) Internet.  TNA has the World Heavyweight, Television, Tag Team, X Division, Knockout, and Knockout Tag Team.  In 2 federations, that’s 13 titles.  It seems like every match on every PPV is for a title.  They’ve been WAY watered down.  The WWE should combine the US & Intercontinental and the WWE and World titles.  TNA has no need a Knockout Tag Team title.  There’s too many titles and because of that they don’t mean shit.

Back in the day it MEANT something to be the Intercontinental Champion.  Honky Tonk Man was one of the best heels in history when he held the IC strap.  Why?  Cause the title meant something and he cheated to hold onto it.  Bret Hart and the British Bulldog main evented a PPV for the Intercontinental title in one of the best matches of all time.  These titles are nothing more than props at this point… they’re swapped with such regularity that it becomes difficult to even keep track of who’s champ.  The WWE championship and the TNA World Title have changed hands 6 times so far this year. The WWE & IC titles 4.  Those “prestigious” titles just simply should be swapping that often… it diminishes them.  I’d absolutely LOVE for Alberto Del Rio to hold onto the title through WrestleMania this year.  It’d make his match absolutely HUGE regardless of who he’s wrestling.  But if history is any indication… he’ll drop it in a PPV or two.

Finally starting to showcase Ziggler's brilliance

Push More Talent

I understand that some people sell more merchandise than others.  I understand that there will always be talent that rises to the top and thus gets more airtime that others.  I understand that this is a business and the feds are in it to make money.  But Jesus Christ… if I’ve got to hear that damn John Cena theme song one more time I’m going to shoot someone.  If I need to watch Eric Bischoff roll down to the ring to babble for 20 minutes with Hulk Hogan (brother) I’m going to puke (brother).  There’s a whole SLEW of talented guys that are relegated to secondary shows (Smackdown) or worse yet Internet or house shows.  We always hear about how both WWE and TNA are cutting back their rosters.  Back in the day both the WWF and WCW/NWA rosters were huge.  You know why?  Cause there were jobbers.  There were guys on the roster who’s only reason for being employed was to lose.  To make the stars look good.  The Iron Mike Sharpe’s and Barry O’s of the world are no longer there.  That’s a very bad thing.

Not only did we have jobbers, but the shows weren’t based around 1 or 2 top guys.  In the “Attitude Era” damn near every guy on the roster could win on any given night.  Damn near every guy could and would main event a show.  Part of that is that there was an overload of talent in the wrestling business at that time.  But another BIG part of it was the fact that they’d had enough TV time to build their characters and people knew who they were… and cared about them.  Sure, there were guys that stood out and had more TV time (Rock, Austin, Hogan, Hall & Nash) but those shows didn’t REVOLVE around them like WWE does Cena and TNA does Hogan/Bischoff these days.  Note to TNA, please see point #1 above.

I saw both Benoit & Guerrero win titles at WrestleMania XX. Both Gone.

Drug Testing

The drug testing policies in both the WWE and TNA are complete shams.  I don’t care what Vince McMahon and Dixie Carter say, it’s not being addressed.  Just in the last couple of months, Kurt Angle, Jeff & Matt Hardy, and Sin Cara (off the top of my head) have been linked to issues. These aren’t “isolated incidences” as we’re lead to believe.  Here’s the most comprehensive list of dead wrestlers I could find… 261 of them.   Sure, not all of them were drug related, but quite a few of them were.  Not just quite a few… more than quite a few.  Like, a shit ton more.

Just since the year 2000, check out this (very partial) list:

• Gary Albright (heart attack age 34)
• Bobby Duncam Jr. (drug overdose age 34)
• Yokozuna (heart attack age 34)
• Terry Gordy (heart attack age 40)
• Russ Haas (heart failure age 27)
• British Bulldog (heart attack age 39)
• Curt Hennig (drug overdose age 44)
• Miss Elizabeth (drug overdose age 42)
• Road Warrior Hawk (heart attack age 46)
• Hercules Hernandez (heart attack age 45)

Seeing a pattern yet?

• Big Boss Man (heart attack age 42)
• Eddie Guerrro (heart failure age 38)
• Bam Bam Bigelow (drug overdose age 45)
• Test (drug overdose age 34)

And that’s just the names most people would know.  Folks… it’s an issue.  Plain and simple.  There are just WAY too many heart issues for folks that are that young and in that good of shape.  Hell, if all these people are having “natural” heart attacks in the shape their in… I’m fucked.  Institute a mandatory drug testing policy with mandatory penalties.  3 strikes and you’re fucked.  Go home forever.  See you on the “Where Are They Now” DVD in a few years.

I’ve got a few more, but I’ve already ranted and rambled for over 1,200 words so I’ll stop with these.  I’m very passionate about this stuff because regardless of how much crap I take for it, I love professional wrestling.  I’ve enjoyed it for 3 decades and plan on enjoying it for many more to come.  I just really think that if some of these changes were made not only would I enjoy it more, but more wrestling fans would return or find it for the first time.

What do you think… Am I off base?  Comments welcome!

As for TNA I certainly can’t fault them either… these are big names in the wrestling business and they’d be stupid just to let them sit at home or worse yet to go to work for another competing promotion.  The problem that I’ve got with TNA here is the WAY they’re using their talent.  When I tuned in a couple of weeks back I could have sworn I was watching a WCW Monday Nitro show from about 10 years ago.  I was given a show with Eric Bischoff and Hulk Hogan calling the shots, Hall & Nash causing a ruckus and Sting hanging out in the rafters.  I mean really… is this the best you can do TNA?

In any case, I got to thinking about just how may retreads TNA actually had so I went and did some research.  Without further adieu, here’s what I found from the current TNA roster.

1. A.J. Styles (Allen Jones) – WCW
2. Bobby Lashley (Franklin Lashley) – WWE
3. Brian Knobbs (Brian Yandrisovitz) – WCW & WWE as part of the Nasty Boys
4. Brother Devon (Devon Hughes) – ECW & WWE as part of the Dudley Boys
5. Brother Ray (Mark LoMonaco) – ECW & WWE as part of the Dudley Boys
6. D’Angelo Dinero (Elijah Burke) – WWE
7. Dr. Stevie (Michael Manna) – ECW, WCE & WWE as Steven Richards, Big Steevie Cool, etc.
8. Jeff Hardy (Jeff Hardy) – WWE
9. Jeff Jarrett (Jeff Jarrett) – WWE, WCW as Jeff Jarrett and Double J
10. Jerry Sags (Jerome Saganovich) – WCW & WWE as part of the Nasty Boys
11. Kevin Nash (Kevin Nash) – WCW, WWE as Diesel, Kevin Nash, etc.
12. Kurt Angle (Kurt Angle) – WWF, WWE
13. Matt Morgan (Matt Morgan) – WWE
14. Mick Foley (Mick Foley) – WCW,ECW, WWE as Mankind, Dude Love, etc.
15. Mr. Anderson (Ken Anderson) – WWE as Mr. Kennedy
16. Orlando Jordan (Orlando Jordan) – WWE
17. Raven (Scott Levy) – ECW, WCW, WWE
18. Rhino (Terry Gerin) – ECW, WWE
19. Scott Hall (Scott Hall) – WCW, WWE as Razor Ramon, Diamond Stud, Scott Hall, etc.
20. Scott Steiner (Scott Rechsteiner) – WCW, ECW, WWE
21. Sean Morley (Sean Morley) – WWE as Val Venis
22. Sting (Steve Borden) – WCW
23. Syxx-Pac (Sean Waltman) – WCW, WWE as X-Pac, 1-2-3 Kid
24. Tomko (Travis Tomko) – WWE as Tyson Tomko
25. Daffney (Shannon Spruill) – WCW
26. Ric Flair (Richard Fliehr) – WCW, WWE
27. Taz  (Peter Senerchia) – ECW, WWE
28. Tara (Lisa Marie Varon) – WWE as Victoria
29. Christy Hemme (Christy Hemme) – WWE
30. Eric Bischoff  (Eric Bischoff)
31. Hector Guerrero (Hector Guerrero) – WWE as the Gobbledy Gooker
32. Hulk Hogan (Terry Bollea)  – WWE, WCW

32 names.  And that’s not to mention some of the off camera talent such as writers, road agents and referees.  The list grows even more if you include folks that have had developmental contracts with the WWE.  One thing that I found very entertaining is the stories behind some of these folks.  Why they went to TNA, why they left WWE, etc.  If you’re looking for some good stories head to Google or Wiki and enjoy!

Monday Night Raw, the longest episodic show in history, is the WWE version and has been rolling right along for years.  When the WCW folded it marked the end of the “Monday Night Wars”… until tomorrow night.

Another wrestling promotion, TNA (Total Nonstop Action) is throwing it’s hat in the ring and making a big splash.  They’ve brought in the most recognizable wrestler of all time: Hulk Hogan.  Hogan played a crucial part in the original “Monday Night Wars” as his heel turn was one of the biggest shockers in history.  For the uninitiated “good guys” are known as “faces” and “bad guys” are known as “heels”.  So when a good guy turns bad, that’s a “heel turn”.

TNA is a relatively unknown promotion on the wrestling horizon, but they’ve definitely got the attention of Vince McMahon and crew over at WWE.  To prove that point, just look to see what the WWE is countering Hogan’s arrival with tomorrow night… Bret “The Hitman” Hart.  Without going into too much detail, let me just say that to a wrestling fan this is HUGE!

I’m not sure if we’re going into another wrestling heyday but I can tell you that for the first time in a long time I’ll be taping TWO wrestling shows tomorrow night… can’t wait!

First off, if you’re not a wrestling fan you’re probably not going to get the brilliance of this book.  It’s over 500 pages long and the detail that Bret goes into is just short of photographic memory type recall.  He does make a reference early in the book of the fact that he kept a diary of sorts over the years but even still the details that he’s able to provide are amazing.

Bret is one of 12 children and he goes into a ton of back story about the Hart family tree which I really didn’t care for.  One thing that the family history did do is frame quite a bit of the angst that is common toward the end of the book.  While the Hart family is certainly synonymous with the wrestling industry this is a book about Bret.  He goes into a ton of details about his marriage, his family, in-laws, etc.  One thing that shocked me was how cavalier he was about his infidelity when on the other hand he was so adamantly against drug use, etc.

Speaking of drug use Bret really sheds some light on the professional wrestling locker room.  He tells tales of steroids, uppers, alcohol, etc. being used like it was candy.  Not only that, but he pulls no punches.  He names names, talks about how he doesn’t like this guy or that guy, and calls out quite a few people for being bad workers in the ring.  He obviously prides himself on his work ethic and it really comes through during these discussions.

If you’re only a WWF / WWE fan then you’re going to want to skip over about the first 200 pages or so.  Those chapters deal with Bret’s time in Stampede Wrestling and other promotions prior to his arrival in the WWF.  That said, I think you owe it to yourself to read that stuff cause there’s some incredible stories in there.  They really provide a foundation for the wrestler that was The Hitman.

Bret talks very openly about everything from his love/hate relationships with Vince McMahon, Shawn Michaels and Hulk Hogan, to the deaths of his brother Owen and countless other wrestlers.  He provides insight into the wrestling business that I’d never seen before (even though I’ve read more than 20 wrestling titles over the years).  He certainly paints some people in a good light and others he completely trashes.  In fact, as I was reading this I was thinking how awesome it would be to have a “rebuttal” book where people would go through chapter by chapter and respond or defend their actions.  The Vince and Shawn chapters would be AMAZING!!!

He talks openly about his divorce, his time in WCW after he left the WWF, Owen’s tragic death and his stroke.  I found it weird that he only mentioned that Chris Benoit was among those wrestlers that have died (not that he murdered his whole family).  I guess that’s one can of worms that Bret didn’t want to open.

I’m a big wrestling fan so I loved this.  If you’re not a wrestling fan you should probably pass as you’ll never get past the Stampede years.  If you’ve ever been a fan of The Hitman you owe it to yourself to pick this one up.  It’s a long read but it’ll give you more Bret Hart than you ever wanted.

Jake like many wrestlers has demons — plenty of them.  He’s battled drug addiction, depression and a whole slew of other shit.  This recent story though takes the cake.  At a local wrestling show near Cleveland he was visually hammered.  He could barely get through the match.  His opponent called for the end of the match and then took the mic and said, “I’ve wrestled drug addicts…you are a piece of shit. You screwed over these people. Fuck you!”

This is bad folks.  Most of the time, the wrestling “fraternity” will take care of stuff like this internally.  The fact that a wrestler is calling out another publicly over the PA system shows just how bad this situation really is.

You can read the full gory details (and see the video) here: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sport/wrestling/article1696887.ece

If you’d like some more background on Jake check out his Wiki page: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jake_Roberts

Personally, I’m going to remember Jake as “The Snake” from the WWF days.  It’s too bad that stuff like this has to happen to a legend.  RIP Jake… you’ll be missed.