Regardless, here it is in all its glory… MAN was that an awesome trip.  Special thanks again to A’s Mom & Dad for making it possible.

This is taken directly from the “couldn’t make this shit up if I tried” file…

Thursday: After a long day at work I was super excited to get down to Florida and see my wife and kids.  Naturally, my flight was delayed 2 hours on the ground in Cleveland.  Luckily I made friends with a whole slew of other folks making the same trip and we managed to get slightly hammered… er… happy in the airport bar before they closed it.  Note to the staff at Cleveland Hopkins: If you’ve got a bunch of people that are pissed off that they’re waiting on a delayed flight, DON’T close the bar.  You’re losing revenue.  I slept on the plane and my father-in-law picked me up at the airport at around 1:00 in the morning.  After a long drive from the airport we got to the condo around 2:00.  Thanks Dad.

Friday: A couple of hours after I arrived, I was woken up to about the best sight a dad can see… my kids next to my bed saying, “DADDY!”  Sure it was 6:30 in the morning, but really… how awesome is that?  Later that morning, C was standing at the toilet peeing and dropped the seat on his dick.  It turned black and blue in about 4 seconds.  Of course the wife runs in wondering what all the commotion is.  Naturally it was Super Dad’s fault cause I was “supervising” at the time.  I’d been in the state about 6 hours and already I’m in trouble.  Through his crying, C managed to get out “I need an ice block”.  Looking back now it’s very cute, but in the moment my heart was breaking for him.  I can’t imagine how bad that hurt…  As I said when I originally made that post this WASN’T the reason we went to the hospital.  Never fear folks… we’ve got 2 kids.  For that we had to look to the G-man.

A couple of days prior (thank goodness I wasn’t present for this one) G got a couple of “slivers” in his thigh.  “Slivers” in this case are defined as 2 inches long and thicker than a toothpick.  While G wailed, mom got them out but over the next couple of days his leg got infected and was very sore to the point where the little man was limping around.  I have to give HUGE props to the wife here.  She does NOT do well with blood normally, but by all accounts she stepped up big time and took control of the situation.  In any case, Friday morning (after C’s incident) we decided to take him to urgent care and get an x-ray to see if we couldn’t get some additional information.  Apparently wood is really difficult to find in an x-ray, so we had to go to the ER for an ultrasound and it turns out he still had some “foreign objects” in his thigh.  4 hours and 6 stitches later we were done.  Keep in mind that we were in FLA for a trip… you know, where you go swimming?  Oh yeah… in case you don’t know, you can’t get stitches wet.  G was a super trooper through the entire ordeal.  Love you buddy.

Saturday: Since the pool was out of the equation, we headed to the Everglades for a FAST boat ride.  The boys absolutely LOVED it (as did I).  This was my first time in the Everglades and I was really looking forward to it.  If you’ve never been, I’d highly recommend it.  It’s absolutely amazing what those boat captains can do at such high speeds!  The one downer to this trip was that my father-in-law took a header getting out of the boat and scraped the hell out of his hand.  He was headed back to the car and there was a anchor for the boat right on the dock where you stepped out.  Pretty stupid placement if you ask me.  More splinters for him and over the next couple of days his hand puffed up and got nice and red.  I’m happy to say that as of this writing I don’t believe he’s had to go to the ER or the doc.

Sunday: Sunday morning, we went to the club for an outstanding brunch including made to order omelets and all the bacon, sausage, fruit and waffles that a kid could eat.  I tell you… my kids are small, but DAMN can they put food away when they put their mind to it.  I’m actually scared to see what they’re going to eat when they get older.  You’ve heard the term “Eating you out of house and home”?  I have a pretty good feeling that’s going to be us in a couple of years (or sooner).  We’d actually planned on taking the kids to Disney World during this trip and today was the day to pack up and head across Florida to the Magic Kingdom.  Looking at a map you’d think this would be a relatively quick trip but for some reason it seemed to take FOREVER.  When we got there, we checked into the hotel which was on Disney property and DAMN was it awesome.  Could see the castle from our room and the boys got to watch the monorails all night long.  A HUGE thank you to Mom/Dad for an awesome way to experience Disney!

Monday: Our first day at Walt Disney World’s Magic Kingdom.  When I woke up that morning and looked outside the pavement in the parking lot looked a little wet, but I figured it was just from the humidity in “Sunshine” State.  Nah… it was absolutely POURING and continued to do so until about 2:00 in the afternoon.  We said (I’m paraphrasing…), “Fuck it, we’re here, we’re gonna get wet, let’s go.”  So we did.  We had an absolute BLAST even with conditions the way they were.  The nice thing about visiting Disney in the rain is that there’s not too many other stupid people out there doing the same thing.  That said, the lines were really short (or non-existent).  It’s been about 20 years or so since I’ve visited and I can’t even begin to tell you how much has changed!  Went back to the hotel in the afternoon to put the kids down to nap, dried our clothes and headed back that afternoon until the park closed.  The weather was MUCH better in the afternoon with no rain and even some sun!  We got to see the famed Disney fireworks display and I have to say that it was completely awesome.

Tuesday: Back to the park at around 11.  We had considered going to one of the other parks (Epcot, MGM, etc.) but decided to head back to the Magic Kingdom cause there was just SO much to see.  We stayed until the park closed at  6:00 PM and then headed back to Naples.  G’s leg is getting much better and even though he was an asshole at the park most of the day (you know… 4 year old tantrum type stuff) we had an awesome time.  I also became an uncle for the first time as well today… 2 months early.  My niece was born at 4 lbs 4 oz and is doing as well as can be expected for being that early. She’ll have to stay at the hospital for about 5 weeks, but mom & baby (and dad) are doing fine.   Congrats guys!  A’s uncle had a massive heart attack and had to be life flighted to Akron General.  Luckily he’s fine and will make a full recovery (thank goodness).

Wednesday: My father-in-law wasn’t feeling well and was sick in bed so mom-in-law took us to the airport.  It was a typical travel day with a 2 and 4 year old which is to say incredibly hectic.  If you’ve never tried to go through security with 2 kids, a wife, a stroller and 4 carry-ons you have  no idea what you’re in for… I’d strongly advise against it.  However, we had a DVD player for the plane ride and the boys even slept for a while on the plane as well.  Back home to a chilly Cleveland evening and got to see the other set of grandparents who were awesome and brought over a home cooked meal!

So that’s that… Florida 2011.  Talk about an eventful trip!  See ya next time!  Simply saying “thanks” to Mom and Dad isn’t nearly enough as its because of you that these Disney dreams were made reality.  The boys don’t understand just how much you’ve given us/them by taking us on this trip but they’ll always have those memories of their first trip to the Magic Kingdom.  Thank you!

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Lethal Weapon (1987) – This flick is just AWESOME and if you have never seen it you owe it to yourself to get out there and rent it.  It’s on my list of Top 80′s Action Movies and the only reason that it’s merely an honorable mention here is that it’s VERY loosely a Christmas movie.  Set out in California this action movie happens to take place around Christmas time and there’s a Christmas tree up in the Murtaugh’s house.  A pretty weak link to Christmas I’ll agree, but the movie is just so damn good that it had to make the list.

Planes, Trains & Automobiles (1987) – Directed by the great John Hughes this flick tells the story of John Candy and Steve Martin trying to get home for the holidays.  This is actually a Thanksgiving movie, but for some reason I always think Christmas which is why I put it on this list.  If you’ve never seen this one, you owe it to yourself for one scene alone: “You can start by wiping that fucking dumb-ass smile off your rosey, fucking, cheeks! And you can give me a fucking automobile: a fucking Datsun, a fucking Toyota, a fucking Mustang, a fucking Buick! Four fucking wheels and a seat!” Need I say more?

Die Hard (1988) – Similar to Lethal Weapon, this is another action movie that happens to be set at Christmas time… and a bad ass action movie at that!  Also similar to Lethal Weapon, it made my list of Top 80′s Action Movies based on the badassery of one man… John McClane.  McClane’s at a Christmas party waiting for his estranged wife, when a bunch of bad guys take over the Nakatomi Tower where the party is being held.  The bad guys (lead by Alan Rickman) have a single purpose and have a great plan in place which is eventually foiled by misplaced McClane.    

How The Grinch Stole Christmas (2000) – As you’ll see further down my list, the story of the Grinch that stole Christmas is one of my all time favorites.  When I found out that this was going to be made into a live action version I wasn’t quite sure what to think until I found out that none other than Jim Carrey was going to be playing the Grinch.  No other rubber-faced man on the planet could have pulled it off as well.

Elf (2003) – This one is relatively new and the first time I saw it I knew that it was high up on my list.  Buddy (Will Ferrell) is an elf who’s left the North Pole.  Along the way he meets his real dad (James Kahn) and hilarity ensues.  The “boy trapped in a man’s body” story has been dozens of times over the years but this twist on it with the comic genius of Ferrell at the helm is simply outstanding.

THE TOP TEN
Please note these are listed in chronological order.  I didn’t have it in me to try and rank them cause I love them all.

It’s a Wonderful Life (1946) – I’ve been hearing about how damn awesome this movie is for as long as I can remember.  Up until last year I’d never even seen it.  One cold winter evening last year, the wife and I decided to check it out (as we’ve got the DVD sitting in the basement and just had never gotten around to watching it).  This one is over 60 years old but it tells a timeless story of a man down on his luck.  There’s so much “bad” going on in George Bailey’s life that you can’t see how things will turn around… until they do.  Well worth the title of “Christmas Classic” that it has in so many circles.

A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965) – The first cartoon on my list and it won’t be the last.  If you don’t know Charlie Brown and the Peanuts gang then I’m not really sure what to tell you other than you need to get off this blog and start reading the greatest comic strip of all time.  Once you’ve done that get into the Christmas spirit by checking out this animated show from before the world was so PC it makes you sick.  Toward the end of this show Linus actually tells the true story of Christmas… you know, the one about that Jesus guy.

How The Grinch Stole Christmas (1966) – Speaking of animated entries, The Grinch first made his appearance in a book by Dr. Seuss, which was immediately followed up by this short animated show.  The story of a pissed off green man living in the hills of Whoville will bring a tear to your eye if you’re not ready for it.  Actually when you get right down to it, this is nothing more than a criticism of the commercialization of Christmas.  Another cool note about this one.  The voice of the Grinch is none other than Mr. Boris Karloff.   Awesome.

A Christmas Story (1983) – Careful kid… you’ll shoot your eye out.  A true cult classic that is now shown for 24 straight hours on TBS each and every year.  This flick about a little boy’s quest for a Red Rider BB gun completely tanked at the theaters but has made a HUGE revival based on DVD sales and television.  This happens to be my wife’s all time favorite movie which is why we have a dog named Ralphie.  No shit.

Gremlins (1984) – Little fury animals that turn into bad ass green lizard looking things if you feed them after midnight.  Throw water on them and you’re in for a world of hurt.  Not quite a “horror” movie but definitely a Christmas favorite.  As a side note, also has an INCREDIBLE sequel.

Santa Claus: The Movie (1985) – I imagine I’ll take some shit for this pick but this is one of my all time faves (hence the reason it’s on this list).  Dudley Moore, John Lithgow and Burgess Meredith lead a cast that tells the story of Santa Claus, elves and an “evil” business man who’s looking to take over Christmas and make it is own.  There’s some incredibly cheesy special effects in here but the story itself is pretty damned entertaining.

Scrooged (1988) – I didn’t rank this list but if I did, this would most definitely be #1 on the list.  The story of Ebinezer Scrooge has been told hundreds of times but never has A Christmas Carol been quite so entertaining.  Bill Murray as Frank Cross turns in what may quite possibly be my favorite of his roles.  Incredibly quotable and one that you can watch over and over again.  “Will someone… stop… the God Damn HAMMERING!”

Christmas Vacation (1989) – The Vacation series of films are hilarious and for some reason people have a tendency to discount the Christmas entry into the series.  If you’re one of those people I’m here to tell you that you need to watch this one like yesterday.  Put aside the fact that the Griswold kids change every flick and lose yourself in a great film.  This is one of the funniest movies of all time whether it’s a Christmas movie or not.  Chevy Chase is at his best here as Clark Griswold in his definitive role and Randy Quaid plays cousin Eddy to absolute perfection.  Some of the all time best one liners are “present” with this flick.  “Shitter’s full!”

Home Alone (1990) – The film that made Macaulay Culkin a household name.  Chris Columbus directs this story by John Hughes of 8 year old Kevin who gets mistakenly left behind when his family goes out of town for the holidays.  Cat burglars Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern know that he’s alone and figure his house will be easy pickings… they couldn’t be more wrong.  Kevin defends his house in some pretty ingenious (and hilarious) ways.

The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992) – I’ve been a Muppet fan since I was a child so it only makes sense that they’d make the list.  Ironically, this is another retelling of A Christmas Carol (the second on this list).  In this musical version of the story, Michael Caine (yes, that Michael Caine) plays Scrooge.  You get all your favorite Muppets here including Gonzo as the narrator and Kermit as Bob Cratchet.  Another plus for this one is that it’s not only kid friendly but will hold their attention the whole way through.  Watch for Beaker flicking off Mr. Scrooge about 20 minutes in… hilarious.

Love Actually (2003) – Follow the lives of 8 couples as they deal with the month leading up to Christmas.  They’ve all at very different points in their lives and yet all of the stories are very believable and touching.  Even if you don’t relate to a specific plot line I can pretty much guarantee that you’ll enjoy the resolutions to each and every one of them.  The cast includes some outstanding names including Bill Nighy, Colin Firth, Liam Neeson, Emma Thompson and Kiera Knightley.  Watch out… there’s a couple of potential tears in here if you’re so inclined.  Merry Christmas!

Harrison Ford – Han Solo (Star Wars, Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi)
Honorable Mention – Indiana Jones (Raiders of the Lost Ark, Temple Of Doom, Last Crusade, Kingdom of the Crystal Skull)
This was quite possibly the most difficult on my list.  In my mind Ford has played two of the most recognizable characters in movie history.  Solo is the baddest smuggler in the galaxy and Dr. Jones is quite simply the coolest archeologist in history (no pun intended).  This would have been an even more difficult decision if Crystal Skull had never come out but with that stinker factoring into the equation I had to go with Solo.

Chevy Chase – Clark W. Grizwold (Vacation, European Vacation, Christmas Vacation, Vegas Vacation)
Honorable Mention – Irwin “Fletch” Fletcher (Fletch)
This was another difficult choice.  Fletch is one of my all time favorite movies but when it comes to a pure character study Clark is tough to top.  The physical comedy is there and you simply can’t go wrong with the tirades that “Sparky” has in every film.

Bill Murray – John Winger (Stripes)
Honorable Mention – Carl Spackler (Caddyshack)
I imagine I’ll get some flack for this one as Carl “It’s in the hole!” Spackler is close to icon status with my generation.  That said, when I think Bill Murray I think Stripes first.  The “Big Toe Hulka” speech that he gives along with the ending where he’s got the troops all in line puts John Winger at the top of my Murray list.

Mark Hamill – Luke Skywalker (Star Wars, Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi)
Honorable Mention – The Joker (Batman Animated)
I almost didn’t put this one on the list cause it’s just too damn easy.  But after reflection I figured THIS is what the list is all about… a role that truly does define one’s career.  Mark Hamill IS Luke Skywalker and Luke Skywalker IS Mark Hamill.  No matter how many comic books and novels I read I’m always picturing Hamill.  He’s gone on to do some great voice work but when it comes to the silver screen its Jedi all the way.

Sean Connery – James Bond (Dr. No, From Russia With Love, Goldfinger, Thunderball, You Only Live Twice, Diamonds Are Forever, Never Say Never Again)
Honorable Mention – John Patrick Mason (The Rock)
The character of James Bond is currently working on his 6th incarnation… but none of the subsequent versions have lived up to the original.  Connery was the first and in my mind will always remain the quintessential Bond.  No actor since has gotten both the suave and action sides of this timeless character.  Shaken, not stirred please.

Marlon Brando – Don Vito Corleone (The Godfather)
Honorable Mention – Jor-El (Superman)
Often imitated, never duplicated.  Brando’s Godfather has become synonymous with mob movies.  Tony Soprano came close but when it comes to running the family Vito still stands at the top of the hill.  Not only did Brando create an icon, but that film still holds up incredibly well today.  If you haven’t seen it, you owe it to yourself.

Susan Sarandon – Annie Savoy (Bull Durham)
Honorable Mention – Sister Helen Prejean (Dead Man Walking)
These days Sarandon is better known for being Mrs Tim Robbins and for her political views.  To me she’ll always be Annie Savoy.  If you’re a baseball fan of any kind then this movie has been on your radar for years.  The dialog in this flick is awesome and the interplay between Sarandon and Kevin Costner is amazing.  This was a pretty easy pick for me in terms of “definitive roles”.

Heath Ledger – The Joker (The Dark Knight)
Honorable Mention – Gabriel Martin (The Patriot)
This one is recent but just too damn easy.  Ledger’s last performance before his untimely death won him an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor – and he SO deserved it.  Prior to this Jack Nicholson held the title for “best Joker performance” and Heath ripped it out of his hands in convincing fashion.  Ledger’s death is sad on so many levels – one of them being that he’ll never have an opportunity to reprise this amazing roll.

Tom Hanks – Forrest Gump (Forrest Gump)
Honorable Mention – Josh Baskin (Big)
Tom Hanks has become one of the most well known actors of our generation.  He’s won multiple Oscars, has directed and produced.  He’s currently the #1 box office star in the world in terms of total gross (over 3.5 BILLION).  All of that said, by far my favorite roll of his is the slow southerner that just loves to run.  The film won 6 Oscars including Hanks’ Best Actor.

Sigorney Weaver – Ellen Ripley (Alien, Aliens, Alien 3, Alien: Resurrection)
Honorable Mention – Dana Barrett (Ghostbusters)
The first Alien film is one of my all time favorites… and the second is above that.  Weaver gives a performance that is matched only by the title character.  Ripley is one of the most recognizable roles out there (male or female).  In fact, AFI named her one of the top 10 greatest heroes in American cinematic history.  That’s good enough for me!

FINAL THOUGHTS

Just a couple of things that I realized/noticed while I was coming up with this list.  Half of the characters listed here were only in one movie.  I suppose those characters could be listed as even MORE iconic as they only had one portrayal to “make it stick”.  There are two movies (or franchises) that appear twice on the list: The Star Wars Saga and Ghostbusters.  This is most certainly due to my movie background bias.  I also find it interesting that the character of The Joker appears twice on this list as well (though to be fair Hamill’s version is only my alternate).  Just goes to show you what an iconic figure that guy is!  As I said at the beginning… let the debates begin!