Event:

For the second year in a row, WrestleMania is being held at the Trump Plaza.  This is also the second event in the anthology that goes to two DVDs.  After a WrestleMania IV card that had 16 matches, the WWF followed up with a 14 match card… that seemed to last FOREVER.  That’s not to say that there aren’t any gems in here cause there are.  Unfortunately we get off a really rocky start with current WWF Women’s Champion Rockin Robin singing America The Beautiful.  Two words… fucking brutal.

Hercules defeated King Haku (with Bobby Heenan)
The opening bout is former Heenan Family member Hercules vs. King Haku.  Bobby Heenan gets on the mic before the match begins and tells the crowd to get on their feet for the King.  My response to this is if he’s so damn good why the hell is he in the opening match?  This isn’t a bad match for what it is.  Pretty clean throughout and Hercules seems to have learned from his slip-up at WrestleMania IV and bridges out of a double pin at the last second to get the victory.

The Twin Towers (Akeem and The Big Boss Man) (with Slick) defeated The Rockers (Shawn Michaels and Marty Jannetty)
Up next is the first time that Mr. WrestleMania Shawn Michaels is on a WrestleMania card as part of the Rockers.  Akeem is absolutely laughable.  The “African Dream”?  Really?  Who at the WWF thought turning the One Man Gang into a jive talking African Queen was a good idea?  In any case, the Rockers actually put up a decent fight for a good long while with some great quick tag team wrestling.  The end comes very quickly though when Shawn Michaels goes off the top rope and gets power bombed.  Holy shit.  Throw in a splash from the over sized Akeem and I’m surprised he ever got up from that one.

Brutus Beefcake and Ted DiBiase (with Virgil) fought to a double countout
Beefcake is the “Barber” at this point and I could never get over how bad his HAIR was.  I suppose that’s the definition of irony huh?  In any case, Brutus is having a bad hair day against the well coiffed Million Dollar Man.  I do have to say that I LOVE me some double clothesline.  Every time I see one I geek out like a total mark.  DiBiase gets the Million Dollar Dream on Beefcake but he makes it to the ring and we get a pretty weak double countout.  Beefcake the proceeds to get Virgil in the sleeper to end the madness.  Waste of time.

The Bushwhackers (Luke Williams and Butch Miller) defeated The Fabulous Rougeaus (Jacques and Raymond) (with Jimmy Hart)
Before the next match, we get a package where we’re shown Luke and Butch eating like a couple of idiots.  I suppose this is in here to show us just how “crazy” they are but it’s a complete waste of time.  The match isn’t much better either.  The Rougeaus are now heels going against the “power” that is the Bushwhackers.  Ho hum.  There’s one pretty humorous moment here when Butch (or Luke I can never tell which) gets body slammed and grabs a handful of one of the Rougeaus’ nut sack.  Hilarious.  A couple of minutes later the Rougeaus celebrate prematurely and get beaten by the Bushwhackers finishing move… a double stomach buster.  Um… kay.

Mr. Perfect defeated The Blue Blazer
Mr. Perfect makes his way down to the ring with no music which sucks cause his music is one of my favorite themes of all time.  He actually slips on his way down to the ring which is ironic seeing that he’s “perfect”.  The Blazer looks awesome here in the early going.  Damn do I miss Owen.  Blazer has the advantage and goes to the top for a big splash.  Perfect brings the knees up at the last second for a BRUTAL looking collision.  Not sure how you can “fake” that one.  Even after that mishap, Blazer manages to take control over most of the match.  After a really close call, Blazer pleads with the ref and turns around right into a Henning forearm.  Perfect follows up wit the Pefect-plex for the victory.

WWF Tag Team Championship
Demolition (Ax and Smash) (c) defeated The Powers of Pain (The Warlord and The Barbarian) and Mr. Fuji
Before the match gets started we’re shown a vignette of Fuji running a 5k.  We follow that up with Run DMC and the “WrestleMania Rap”???  Gorilla says that a little bit of rap goes a long way.  In this instance I have to totally agree with him.  The WWF typically does some sort of “filler” during the big show but this is crazy.  The match itself is about what you’d expect from 4 big guys and a run down Master Fuji.  Some good back and forth between Demolition and P.O.P. with Fuji only getting involved when Demolition is completely beat down and then out quickly.  The end comes when Fuji goes to the good ol ceremonial salt in the eyes gimmick and it backfires when he gets his own man.  Demolition takes advantage and hits their “finisher that wouldn’t hurt but looks cool” on Fuji for the win to retain their titles.

Dino Bravo (with Frenchy Martin) defeated Ronnie Garvin
Next up is Garvin and Bravo with a random appearance by Jimmy Snuka.  He’s on his way back to the fed and apparently Vince wants to send him out so folks can remember what he looks like.  The match itself is a good fair match.  Garvin is going crazy with the cradles… inside cradle, sunset flip attempts, etc.  At one point Bravo goes for the gayest looking bear hug in the history of wrestling.  Bravo hits a side suplex out of nowhere for the win.  After the match, Ronnie gets the “Garvin Stomp” on Frenchie in a typical “face loses but has to get revenge on the manager” moment.

The Brain Busters (Arn Anderson and Tully Blanchard) (with Bobby Heenan) defeated Strike Force (Rick Martel and Tito Santana)
Even after all of these years, its still weird to see Blanchard and Anderson in the WWF – they’ll always be WCW guys (and Horseman at that) to me.  Strikeforce is back together for the first time in quite a while but have everything running smoothly at the beginning of the match.  Nice little side by side dropkicks send the Busters to the floor.  A while later Strikeforce gets a double figure four right in the middle which is really cool visually but Arn breaks up with a rake to the eye.  Tito fucks up and hits Martel with the flying burrito (forearm) which sends Martel outside.  Martel selling it like Tito took his head off.  Time for a totally telegraphed heel turn.  Tito is getting double teamed and Martel is still on the outside hurting.  Martel refuses to extend the arm to take the tag and eventually leaves Tito in the ring to fend for himself.  Tito gets his ass kicked for another couple of minutes before getting hit with a spike piledriver.  I’ve got to say that Tito pretty much carries the match here.  Well done Chico.  We get a post match interview with Martel who’s always been terrible on the mic and this is no exception.

At this point we get an in-ring segment with Brother Love, Morton Downey Jr. and Roddy Piper.  Downey is smoking on the way to the ring which is king of funny.  Downey and Brother Love go at each other for a couple of minutes and then Piper makes his way to the ring.  Brother Love just kind of disappears.  This ends with Downey blowing smoke in Piper’s face, Piper getting pissed and spraying him with a fire extinguisher.  I remember this being much cooler than it was.

After the Piper/Downey thing we’re shown a preview of the Hulk Hogan “classic” No Holds Barred.  We might as well rename it the “Hulk Hogan Federation” at this point.  I mean, is there ANY chance in hell that he’s going to lose the main even with Vince so far up his ass?  Gene nearly laughs when he says how this movie is going to be a “blockbuster”.  After that segment, Jesse Ventura is all fired up about how Hogan is coming to Hollywood because it’s “his” town.

We get a pretty decent recap of the Mega Powers at this point.  Nothing out of the ordinary, but one really interesting nugget here.  During Hogan’s interview they actually overdub his voice when he says “WWF” so it says “WWE”.  Are you kidding me?

Jake Roberts defeated André the Giant (with Bobby Heenan) by disqualification
Big John Stud is the special guest referee for this match.  Andre is still a heel at this point after his WrestleMania III and WrestleMania IV Hogan encounters.  Looking at this now it’s really sad.  I’ve always been a big Jake fan but this seems like a big step down for Andre.  Andre is really looking bad at this point in his career as he can barely move around the ring.  At one point Andre gets hooked in the ropes (as he always does).  If there’s ever been a signature move in wrestling, this is it.  The entire match Jake is going for the bag to try and get Damien.  The end of this match turns into a complete clusterfuck.  Andre and Stud get into it, DiBiase grabs the bag and hightails it, Jake goes after DiBiase, blah blah blah.  Damien finally makes his appearance and Andre takes off out of the ring.  Pussy.  Seriously are we supposed to believe that Andre is scared of a snake?  Dude would eat it in like two bites.

The Hart Foundation (Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart) defeated The Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine (with Jimmy Hart)
This is pre “Rhythm & Blues” for Honky and Hammer but in retrospect you can see it coming.  Even after all of these years Honky sells an atomic drop better than anyone in history.  The Foundation is running on all cylinders with some great tag wrestling.  Hart slingshots Anvil in over the top right into the bad guys.  Actually Anvil looks incredible here and actually pulls out a standing drop kick?!?!?  I don’t care what you say, that’s damn impressive for a guy that size.  The end comes when Anvil throws Jimmy Hart’s megaphone to Bret who nails Honky with it.  Here’s a question… what do you think the lifetime average of the megaphone is?  Might be time to leave that one in the locker room there Jimmy.

WWF Intercontinental Championship
Rick Rude (with Bobby Heenan) defeated The Ultimate Warrior (c)
Before this match we’re shown footage of the Rude/Warrior pose down at the Royal Rumble that set this match up.  God damn is Rude ripped up.  Rude’s got some sweet tights complete with the IC title already on them.  Warrior hits the ring and we’re off and running.  Warrior is manhandling Rude whipping him into the corners really hard.  Rude selling like a motherfucker.  Warrior goes right into a bear hug to slow things down.  Remember people… Warrior’s got all kinds of charisma, but can’t wrestle worth a shit.  Rude breaks the hold with fingers to the eyes and follows up with a huge dropkick off the top that looks great.  Warrior powers out before the one count and goes into multiple body slams followed by another bear hug.  Warrior goes for a big splash in the middle of the ring and Rude gets his knees up right in the breadbasket.  Rude tries to swivel his hips a couple of time and just can’t do it cause his back is injured.  End comes when Rude gets dumped out of the ring.  Warrior goes to suplex him back into the ring.  Mid-suplex, Heenan grabs the Warrior’s leg which causes Rude to fall on Warrior.  Bobby holds on to the Warrrior’s leg so he can’t kick out and Rude gets the title.  Beat down on The Weasel post match.

Jim Duggan and Bad News Brown fought to a double disqualification
This is essentially a throwaway match and I’m shocked that it’s so late on the card.  There’s essentially not one wrestling hold here at all and by the time the match is over we’ve got bats and chairs in the ring.  Are we really supposed the believe that Bad News is a bad ass?  Not so much.

The Red Rooster defeated Bobby Heenan (with The Brooklyn Brawler)
If the last match was “essentially” a throwaway then this one is completely a throwaway.  My only question is who in the hell did Red Rooster piss off to be booked against Bobby Heenan?  Actually, I’ve got another question as well.  Who did he blow to be booked second to last on the card?  This one is nothing that you wouldn’t expect.  Rooster pins Heenan a couple of minutes in and then for some reason celebrates.  Not sure why he’s happy.  Perhaps no one told him he’s got a red mohawk and is wrestling as a farm animal.  Brooklyn Brawler beats on Rooster after the match.

WWF Championship
Hulk Hogan defeated Randy Savage (c)
This one made my list of Top 10 WrestleMania matches and watching it again totally validated that pick.  Savage comes out first complete with theme music and pose down.  Liz gets her own entrance with music as she’s not supposed to be in either man’s corner (though she still has Macho’s music).  Ventura points out that the champ should enter the ring last I being the old school dork I am I completely agree with him.  The crowd is totally behind Hogan from the get go.  Hogan starts out with the dreaded “closed fists” and Savage follows up with his standard double axe handle.  Hogan takes over after throwing Savage out of the ring.  He follows up with a couple of elbow drops (though not the Savage variety) and an eye rake.  A few minutes later, Savage takes over and Hogan is bleeding above the eye.  I’ve seen this match a hundred times and I just didn’t remember Hogan bleeding here.  Savage does some showboating and allows Hogan back into it.  Hogan slams Savage over the top and Liz goes over to help.  Savage playing the heel shrugs her off.  Hogan gets the advantage again and goes to slam Savage against the post on the outside and Liz steps in the way.  A few moments later Hogan is down and hurt and Liz comes to HIS aid.  Finally the bullshit love triangle ends and referee Dave Hebner sends her away from ringside.  Time to get down to some wrestling.  Savage hits the double axe handle on Hogan as he’s draped across the guardrail.  Hogan chokes a la Rick Steamboat.  Macho then continues with the choking tactics using tape from his wrists.  Macho then hits the HUGE elbow right in the middle of the ring.  Hogan “Hulks up” out of nowhere: block, punch, shake head, point, punch, punch, punch, slam, leg drop victory.  Real American and the crowd goes home happy.  A-W-E-S-O-M-E!

General Thoughts

• This is a LONG show.  This wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t for so much throwaway garbage that we’ve been given.  These backstage vignettes have GOT to stop.  I’d much rather have a 3 hour show full of action rather than a 4 hours show with an hour of crap thrown in for filler.
• If I was in the arena I’d be pissed.  If you don’t count the Piper/Downey segment there was over a half hour between in ring action.  That’s unacceptable.
• With the exception of Perfect/Blazer and Savage/Hogan this is a pretty lackluster show.  That said, if you’re at all an old-school Hogan fan, you NEED to see this one.

This is the first WrestleMania that I remember a hype for outside of the wrestling world.  In addition to the pre-event hype, I remember vividly seeing on front page of the Cleveland Plain Dealer sports page the next day a huge photo of Hogan and Andre.  In my mind this is the first time that WrestleMania was really an “event”.  The opening shots of the crowd are very impressive and the venue is so big that the wrestlers need to be carted in from the dressing room.

The Can-Am Connection (Rick Martel and Tom Zenk) defeated Bob Orton and The Magnificent Muraco (with Mr. Fuji)
I’ve gone on record with my distaste for tag team wrestling and this one really didn’t do a whole lot to change that.  First off… what’s with tag teams that LOOK the same?  Zenk and Martel are essentially the same dude with the exception that Zenk walks like he’s got a stick up his ass.  The good guys get the win when they hit a cross body block on Muraco in conjunction with a schoolboy.  Not a terrible match but nothing more than a crowd warm up in my opinion.

Billy Jack Haynes and Hercules (with Bobby Heenan) fought to a double countout
Very happy to say that the WWF is finally getting it and giving us some storyline recaps before the matches.  To make a long story short this is full nelson vs. full nelson.  Hercules is REALLY getting into character in his pre-match interview when he makes reference to “When I used these chains thousands of years ago”.  Um… OK.  Billy Jack looks like a cross between a gay leprechaun and Randy Savage.  How’s that for a mental image?  Hercules is the first to lock on the full nelson but alas his fingers aren’t locked.  For some reason I kept thinking of the Sly Stallone flick Over The Top here cause we all know, that in arm wrestling if you move your thumb over 2 inches you’re definitely going to win.  In any case we get both wrestlers out of the ring and Billy Jack chooses THIS time to lock on his full nelson.  After the fastest 10 count in the history of the WWF both wrestlers are counted out.  After the match, Hercules uses his 1,000 year old chain to bust open BJ to further the storyline.

Hillbilly Jim, The Haiti Kid and Little Beaver defeated King Kong Bundy, Little Tokyo and Lord Littlebrook by disqualification
OK… one question.  Who did Bundy piss off to go from main eventing WrestleMania 2 to being part of a 6-man midget match at WrestleMania III?  And while we’re on the subject – a MIDGET match?  Come on WWF.  I know times have changed but who thought this was a good idea?  Believe it or not, this one is actually rather entertaining until Bundy drops an elbow on one of the little guys and gets DQ’d.  Then of course all the midgets ban together with Hillbilly Jim to protect their downed brethren.  Funny little (no pun intended) match but not much more than filler.

Loser Must Bow match
Harley Race (with Bobby Heenan and The Fabulous Moolah) defeated The Junkyard Dog
One of the things that I’m noticing while re-watching these events is just how far we’ve come from a politically correct standpoint.  During one of his pre-match interviews JYD says something to the effect of, “I’m as black as the day is long.”  This sort of thing doesn’t bother me in the slightest but there’s no way that a statement like this would make it on the air today.  OK, end social observation.  This is a decent little match for what it is.  Harley Race is way past his prime here and I’m not sure that JYD was ever all that great of an in ring performer.  Race gets the victory with an “out of no where” belly to belly suplex that really didn’t look all that devastating.  JYD give a little curtsy to fulfill his “loser bows” stipulation and then proceeds to hit Race with a chair and put on his cape to a huge pop from the crowd.

The Dream Team (Greg Valentine and Brutus Beefcake) (with Johnny Valiant and Dino Bravo) defeated The Fabulous Rougeaus (Jacques and Raymond)
This match is here for a couple of reasons.  First, it was to showcase the Rougeaue brothers who were going to be getting a big push in future months.  Second it was the start of the Brutus Beefcake face turn (when he became “The Barber”).  To make a really long and boring story short, The Rougeaus hit their finisher (as I like to call it the Balls-to-the-Face) but don’t manage to win the match.  Dino bravo gets involved knocking one of the Rougeaus out allowing the Dream Team to get the pin.  Beefcake (for some reason) isn’t happy with this turn of events and doesn’t leave the ring with Valentine, Bravo and Valiant.  This becomes important in the next match…

Hair vs. Hair match
Roddy Piper defeated Adrian Adonis (with Jimmy Hart)
I commented in my WrestleMania 2 review about how out of shape Adrian Adonis was.  A year later and the WM2 version of Adonis looks slim in comparison to his WM3 counterpart.  This is billed a Piper’s “retirment match” which in retrospect is fucking hilarious seeing as Piper is STILL active in wrestling to this day.  All of that said this is a great match.  It’s hair vs. hair with Piper “on his way out” so you pretty much have to assume that he’s going to win but they do a nice little swerve ending with Adonis putting Piper to sleep only to celebrate one second too soon and not allowing Piper’s hand to hit the mat the third time.  Brutus Beefcake runs to Piper’s aid helping him to wake up which allows Piper to slap on a sleeper of his own getting the victory.  Beefcake holds Jimmy Hart down as Piper shaves Adrian’s head.  Beefcake gets in on the action as well creating his “Barber” persona which he’d have for many years.  My most memorable moment of this match is when Adonis comes to and realizes he’s lost the match and has his head shaved.  Piper shows him a mirror which Adrian punches and clearly mouths “WHAT THE FUCK!!!”  Hilarious.

The Hart Foundation (Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart) and Danny Davis (with Jimmy Hart) defeated The British Bulldogs (Davey Boy Smith and The Dynamite Kid) and Tito Santana
Before this match Jesse “The Body” Ventura is announced to the crowd.  Not sure why as he doesn’t do or say anything.  I suspect it’s simply because Predator was opening shortly and they wanted to get his name/face out there some more.  On to the match.  There’s nothing worse on a big card (I.E. WrestleMania) than a filler match.  That is except for a 6-man tag team filler match.  There’s some semblance of story line here as Danny Davis is a corrupt referee that has essentially give the tag titles to the Hart Foundation and has caused Tito to lose the IC title.  That’s not enough to keep me interested in this snooze fest that ends with Davis hitting Davey with Hart’s megaphone for the win.  Yawn.

Butch Reed (with Slick) defeated Koko B. Ware
Butch Reed makes his debut against future WWE Hall Of Famer Koko B. Ware.  And please don’t even get me started on why in the HELL Koko is a Hall Of Famer.  Koko does what he does best – loses a match.  Afterward, Tito Santana continues his WrestleMania tradition of getting involved where it makes absolutely no sense and come to the ring and beats up poor Slick.

WWF Intercontinental Championship
Ricky Steamboat (with George Steele) defeated Randy Savage (c) (with Miss Elizabeth)
Part of the reason that I’ve really been looking forward to WrestleMania III is due to the fact that this match was on the card.  It’s one of my Top Ten WrestleMania Matches and it’s always a joy to watch it.  Part of what made this match amazing was the back story which the WWF does a great job recapping.  Essentially Macho Man crushed Steamboat’s larynx and put him out of commission for a couple of months.  This is Steamboat’s last chance to get revenge and the title.  The crowd is into this match from the start and literally gets to a frenzy through a series of close finishes.  This match is pure brilliance as Savage and Steamboat go back and forth with some really slick moves.  Macho hits his flying elbow but the referee has been knocked out so he doesn’t get the win.  Savage then goes to the outside and grabs the bell which he used to injure Steamboat’s larynx.  George Steele gets involved and takes the bell away from him.  Savage then turns his attention back to Steamboat and picks him up for a body slam.  Steamboat reverses the slam into a small package and pins Savage clean in the center of the ring for the victory.  If you’ve never seen this match you owe it to yourself to do so… it’s a classic.

The Honky Tonk Man (with Jimmy Hart) defeated Jake Roberts (with Alice Cooper)
I tell you… as time goes by I enjoy Honky Tonk Man more and more.  I don’t think I really appreciated him all that much back in the day but damn can he play a heel with the best of them.  Jake was never all that great in the ring but he’s one of the best ever when it comes to portraying a character.  This is tight little match with some good back and forth action before Honky uses the ropes to get the pin.  In retrospect this match is an obvious setup for the Intercontinental Title run that Honky went on as well as future programs with Jake.  After the match Alice Cooper gets involved and drapes Damien over Jimmy Hart.  The post match stuff was a complete waste of time but not surprising when you’ve got a “celebrity” like Alice Cooper in the ring.

The Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff (with Slick) defeated The Killer Bees (B. Brian Blair and Jim Brunzell) by disqualification
I’m shocked that this match was as late in the card as it was.  It was a decent little tag match with outside interference by Hacksaw Jim Duggin causing the Bees to lose.  Hacksaw is on his anti-all-things-not-American kick and of course has vowed never to allow Volkoff to sing his Russian national anthem (which we all know he does all the time).  I honestly don’t remember where this feud went but this match is an obvious setup for that.  Unfortunately for Bees fans this is essentially the last of their heyday as they went onto get repeatedly squashed by Demolition.

WWF Championship
Hulk Hogan (c) defeated André the Giant (with Bobby Heenan)
This match made my honorable mentions on my Top WrestleMania Matches and after re-watching it I think I might have been wrong in making it just an honorable mention!  This match is outstanding!  Hogan is a huge dude and he’s absolutely dwarfed by Andre.  Typically “big men” matches are pretty boring but this one simply isn’t.  Hogan goes for a slam at the very beginning of the match and hurts his back.  Andre nearly gets a pin in the first 30 seconds of the match.  From there Andre essentially beats on Hogan for a good couple of minutes with Hogan playing it perfectly.  Hogan makes a brief comeback which Andre squashes.  There are a couple of complete “rest holds” in here (bear hug) but both men are really making it look great.  Andre whips Hogan into the ropes and goes for a big kick which Hogan ducks and follows up with a big forearm that knocks The Giant to the mat.  Hogan goes for a scoop slam which I don’t care what you say is damn impressive.  He finishes off Andre with a patented leg drop for the 1-2-3.  Real American and pose down follows “giving the crowd what they want”.

General Thoughts

• THIS is finally what WrestleMania should be.  It feels like a big show.  The matches deliver.  I’m guessing this is the first time they were able to deliver what Vince McMahon had in mind when he dreamed up the concept.
• Whatever happened to the concept of a “stable” of wrestlers?  The Heenan Family, The Four Hoursemen, Jimmy Hart’s crew?  These days the best we’ve got is DX and they’re simply a tag team.  I miss stables who had one another’s backs.
• The intro packages are finally up to snuff here.  This is the first WrestleMania where you can sit down and watch it without knowing the history (as they give you enough of the storyline to be caught up).
• There are a couple of references in here to the “Federettes” (ring side girls).  It’s the only time that I remember them every being referenced in WWF history.
• Celebrity involvement blows.  I don’t mind so much when they’re announcers, timekeepers, etc. but when they are in the corner of the wrestlers you just KNOW that they’re going to get involved.  Leave the fighting to the wrestlers people.
• There have been hundreds of matches in WrestleMania history.  Any show that produces two of my all time favorites is a show worth watching.