The fact that Time Warner couldn’t get their shit together on THAT night is crazy.  I could almost understand it if the weather sucked last night… but it didn’t.  About half way through the show we got a “We’re Experiencing Technical Difficulties” message.  No shit.  Next we got a message that said, “The season finale of Lost will re-air in its entirety next Saturday…”  Great.  So I get to watch it the way it was intended to be seen a week after it’s original air date.  The only comparison I can make would be if they were having these kinds of issues during the Super Bowl.  “Attention, Super Bowl XLV will be re-aired in its entirety next Sunday…”  Really?

1. Show the damn aliens – At this point the only look we’ve gotten at the V’s that shows us their true nature is when Erika’s partner got killed and when Anna decided to munch on her baby daddy.  Part of what made the original AWESOME was that we as the audience knew what we were up against.  If you had only been exposed to V through this version you don’t even know what they look like.  That’s gotta change.
2. Give the 5th Column a win – So far, their claim to fame is some “John May Lives” message and killing a V soldier that no one knows existed.  In the first incarnation, the 5th Column unmasked the supreme leader on national TV for Christ sakes!
3. Show the V’s as “bad” – during a recent episode, a character said something to the affect of “Tell me something bad that the Visitors have done”.  With the exception of spying on us and the fact that they’re concealing who they are, we don’t REALLY know why they’re so bad at this point.  It was pretty early in the original when we found out that they were here for FOOD.  If the audience is going to care, we need to build the V’s up as a REAL threat.
4. Lose the CGI – I understand that this is TV and not the movies, but just about every shot from the mother ships are just terrible.  This includes interior shots.  We’ve got to do better.

I hate to continue to compare to the original but that’s all I’ve got to go on and that was a hugely successful cult classic.  The fact that after tonight it WON’T be following Lost is actually a good thing.  Lost is a phenomenal show, but as a lead in to another sci-fi I’m not sure it’s all that great.  When Lost is over, people either run to message boards or blogs to chat or they’re too wiped out to try and get into another intense show.  I’m not saying that it should follow a comedy, but Lost isn’t the best choice.

While I have listened to some podcasts during the break I’ve tried to stay away from plot predictions and spoilers for the last season.  Sure I’ve had a discussion or two with some fellow Losties but when it comes to what’s going to happen this season I’m completely… lost. (Sorry, I couldn’t resist at least one pun).

Based on the buzz on the web and in the paper it seems like the long layoff between seasons hasn’t turned anyone else off either.  It’s looking like we’re in for a hell of a last season and I can’t wait.  It’s going to be so awesome to see how they finish off some story lines and which ones they leave dangling cause you just KNOW they’re not going to be able to tell us everything that we want to know.  While I’m sure there are some things that I’ll be disappointed in I’m willing to accept that.  The show is just too good to miss.  And now… finally.  It’s time for Lost!

I’ve heard about this for quite a while now and to be honest with you I can’t believe I’m as behind as I am on following this story (Thanks Jason!)  The series is going to premiere on ABC November 3rd at 8:00 PM.  For those of you un-familiar with the original story (and subsequent sequel), V tells the story of alien visitors who visit Earth under the guise of peace all the while plotting to “harvest” humans for food.

Everything that I’m reading continues to use the term “re-imagining” rather than reboot, remake or sequel.  This certainly isn’t a continuation of the time line from the original series (which is totally a good thing).

The cast looks great including Elizabeth Mitchell (of Lost fame playing a female Mike Donovan), Morena Baccarin (playing the lead Visitor made famous by Jane Badler’s Dianna), Morris Chestnut, Scott Wolf and others.

Check out the official stuff from ABC here: http://beta.abc.go.com/shows/v

Note:  Over the last couple of days it’s been reported the V is taking a “creative hiatus” starting Wednesday and will shut down production for a couple of weeks.  This shouldn’t affect things for the premier in November unless there are HUGE issues but this type of announcement is generally not a good thing.  Stay tuned.

This will contain spoilers – if you want to know nothing about the movie before you see it skip this post and come back after you’ve seen it.

If you’re like me you heard very bad things about this flick.  I heard that it was the worst previewed movie in history, that the director had been fired halfway through, that they weren’t going to allow official movie reviews, etc.  Since most people are going to go into it with the “it sucks” mentality I’ll start off with the bad stuff.

THE BAD STUFF

1. The CGI – it’s fucking terrible.  There are quite a few times where it’s was so bad that it took me out of the movie.  Planes don’t fly accurately, characters do shit that wouldn’t be remotely possible (even when you suspend disbelief) and there are some scenes where you can almost see the green screen technicians standing in the background.
2. The outfits – not so great.  I can’t really put my finger on it but the Joes just don’t look “authentic”.  They’ve got a Starship Troopers look to them… if that makes any sense.  The military folks in The Transformers look much more realistic.
3. Cobra – so the movie is called “The Rise Of Cobra” and you don’t get much of that until the last minute of the movie.  Should have/could have done more.

THE CHARACTERS

• Snake Eyes – Ray Park is a bad ass and he looks great with one exception – he’s got a mouth.  Terrible.  Looks nothing like the original character and there’s not even a “movie” reason for the change.  Not good.
• Baroness – SMOKIN.  Sienna Miller is incredible in this role and looks amazing.  I’ve always thought of Baroness as a bit “matronly” and there was none of that here.  I didn’t dig her back story but I can deal with it.
• Duke – really looked the part but I’ve always thought of Duke as an “older” Joe.  Every time Channing Tatum was on screen I couldn’t help think of WWE superstar John Cena.
• Destro – you don’t see him plated until the end which is fine.  The actor is a little too thin for my liking but definitely plays the cerebral Destro to perfection.
• Ripcord – I really thought Marlon Wayans would get on my nerves.  He didn’t.  Well done Marlon.
• Scarlett – PERFECT casting.  Rachel Nichols captures her character and plays her to a T.  Oh… and she’s HOT!
• Storm Shadow – I preferred the comic version where you didn’t know really who he was and rarely saw him out of ninja gear but I’ve got no problem with this treatment.
• Hawk – Dennis Quaid was a perfect choice for Hawk.  Not a big role in this flick but needed an actor that could pull it off.
• Heavy Duty – bad choice of an actor.  Based on his appearances in Lost and Oz I just couldn’t see Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje in this role.
• Breaker – I’ve got a certain affinity toward this character as he was my first ever figure.  I’m not a huge fan of changing him from American to Moroccan but I was happy with the way he was portrayed.
• Cobra Commander – what… the… fuck.  The back story is wrong, the outfit is terrible and for a flick called “The Rise of Cobra” he’s got no screen time.  You simply cannot have Cobra Commander without the faceplate or the hood.  Awful.
• Zartan – happy to see him in the film and REALLY looking forward to what they do with his character in the sequel.  Nothing like the comic/figure but that was to be expected.

THE GOOD STUFF

1. Action – make no mistake – this is an action movie.  It’s not a retelling of the comic and it’s certainly not the “made for TV nobody gets shot when there’s a milion bullets flying” stuff that you got with the cartoon.  The Paris sequence is great and the attack on the Pit was a treat to watch.
2. Nostalgia – I’ve been waiting for this flick for nearly 30 years.  To finally see the Joes on the big screen was awesome.  I was naturally comparing it to the cartoon/comics but I can honestly say that I was completely entertained the entire way.
3. The origins – I’ve said a couple of times that I don’t like the back story that they’ve given the characters.  This is partially due to MY history with the characters so I can overlook that.  That said, this doesn’t feel like an “origin movie” which it clearly is.  The story moves along quite well and the back stories are told through a series of flash backs in a way that doesn’t detract from the plot.
4. The setup – based on the limited previews that I saw I thought I’d hate the storyline for this flick (what the hell is a nano-mite anyways?)  I was pleasantly surprised that I really found myself caring about the plot.  The ending was tight and totally left some great jumping off points for a sequel.

RECOMMENDATION

In a previous post I bitched about how my childhood was being raped.  Honestly I’m really happy to finally see this flick on the big screen.  I can understand why there have been a slew of negative reviews but if you’re a child of the 80′s like me I’m guessing you’re going to enjoy watching this.  Go into expecting the same characters and plots that you got in the 80′s and you’ll be disappointed.  Go into expecting a fun popcorn action movie and you’ll be happy.  Recommended movie for fans of the G.I. Joe universe.  I was able to overlook the bad stuff and walked out of the theater entertained and looking forward to more G.I. Joe and Cobra.

1. Fast cars
2. Beautiful women
3. The “bad guys” are actually the “good guys”
4. Fast cars
5. A little plot
6. Fast cars
7. More women
8. Fast cars

That’s pretty much it.  If you’re looking for really deep movies here you’re not going to get them.  If you’re looking for some bad ass action sequences that will put on you the edge of your seat then you’re in the right place.

The cast from the original is back which is a great thing.  Vin Diesel plays Dominic Toretto who’s a mechanic/street racer and is always seeming to be on the wrong side of the law.  Paul Walker plays Brian O’Conner, former police officer turned street racer who’s tapped by the feds to infiltrate the inner circle of a Mexican drug lord.  Jordana Brewster plays Dom’s sister Mia who was the love interest of O’Conner in the first film.  Michelle Rodriguez (of Lost fame) reprises her roll as Letty Ortiz for about 20 minutes until her character is murdered setting up the majority of the plot.  As a side note, not sure why Rodriguez’s characters keep getting killed off (she died in Lost as well).  Maybe she’s a huge pain in the ass to work with… who knows.  I have been seeing stuff on the Internet that there is a huge following of her character in this film and people want her character resurrected for the suspected 5th film in the series… time will tell.

I think the producers finally figured out what makes this franchise work from a casting perspective… you’ve got to have both Vin Diesel & Paul Walker in the film.  Let’s take a look:

• First film had both: GREAT
• Second film had only Walker: So So
• Third film had no Walker and only a cameo of Diesel: Fair at best
• Fourth film had both: GREAT

Please recognize that “GREAT” is a relative word.  These are great films for what they are… balls to the wall action flicks.  Very little plot, tons of fast moving scenes and a bunch of hot women.  Brewster and Rodriguez (briefly) are smokin and we get introduced to Gal Gadot (a legit Miss Universe contestant) as well.  That doesn’t even take into account all of the random hotties throughout the film.  At one point during the film I leaned over to my buddy and said, “Where in the hell does all this street racing take place and why can’t I find it.”  His response, “I don’t know, but if you find it and don’t take me, I’ll kill you.”

The end of the film sets up a potential sequel very nicely with Dom being transported to prison and the gang comes up on the bus obviously preparing to spring him free.  Definitely a nice touch.  As I’ve said before if you’re looking for Oscar material here you won’t get it, but if you’re looking for a good “dumb action / popcorn movie” then you can’t do much better.

• When you have no “plans” for the weekend you’ll look back on Monday morning and realize just how tiring doing “nothing” really is.
• A child that takes a nap every day during the week will NOT take a nap on the weekend… especially when you REALLY want him to take a nap.
• The same child that is not napping and is really pissing you off will turn everything around simply by hugging you and saying, “I love my daddy.”
• My wife and I keep WAY too much paperwork.  When we finally get around to getting rid of this paperwork it will cause World War III.  Not sure why, cause we both agree that we keep way too much paperwork.
• Shredding unwanted paperwork takes forever and a fucking day.  I should really buy a paper shredder that will shred more than 3 sheets of paper at a time.  However, when I’m in the office supply store I NEVER think buying a paper shredder is a good idea.
• Lost is a great show.  The wife and I are perpetually 1 or 2 episodes behind.
• Per my last “what I learned” post, Top Chef is awesome.  I’m glad that Hosea won but I think if the vote was based on the entire season (which I thought it was) that Stefan probably should have won.  Carla was lucky to be in the finals.
• When something tastes terrible it will require Dad to test it out and see how bad it really is… even when two boys and Mom have already agreed that it’s terrible.  Regardless of their reaction, Dad will in fact try it and agree with them that it’s awful.

So… I’m a HUGE horror movie fan and have been for years and years.  I’d seen the hype for the Saw franchise for quite a while and just had never gotten around to watching it.  Finally I had some traveling coming up and decided I wanted to watch it so I ripped it to my iPod and watched this movie over a couple of days…. WOW.  It’s certainly not in the same vane as Michael Myers & Jason Voorhees “slash fests” but this is a downright GREAT horror movie.  I haven’t seen the rest of the franchise yet but I’m definitely going to put them on my list.

CAST: I actually didn’t realize until I started watching it what a great cast this was.

• Cary Elwes – of The Princess Bride fame
• Danny Glover – still getting “too old for this shit” from Lethal Weapon
• Ken Leung – you’ll know him from Lost, X-Men: The Last Stand, Law & Order, Etc.
• Michael Emerson – the great Ben from Lost

They all put in great performances in what I consider to be an often overlooked movie genre.  Whether you like them or not, horror movies are here to stay!

STORY: Two men wake up in a room with a dead body between them.  They don’t know how they got there, why they are there or what they are supposed to do.  What they do know is they are chained in the room with very little means of escape.  The killer “Jigsaw” informs them that there is in fact a way to escape, what needs to be done and what happens if the “rules” are not followed.  Horror movies are less about the story and more about the thrill factor and gore so I’ll leave this part of review at this:  The story of this flick could stand on its own merit.  Right up there with Se7en in terms of “oh shit” factor.

GORE/KILLS: Some very inventive kill scenes in this one.  It’s not all that gory in relation to some of the horror movies out there today but there’s definitely enough for the bloodthirsty out there.  This is definitely not your “hockey masked hack and slash” that has plagued the Friday the 13th franchise for so long.  (That said, I LOVE those movies )  Not since the Scream have I seen such a “smart” horror movie.  Very well done indeed.

CONCLUSIONS: If you’re a horror movie fan this is a great flick.  You’ll have plenty of scares and a good amount of gore.  For a killer who doesn’t do all that much killing Jigsaw is a breath of fresh air.  I can’t WAIT to see the rest of this franchise!