The 411 From 406

I’ve often said that one of my least favorite wrestlers of all time is the WWF’s Koko B. Ware.  (The character that is… I actually enjoyed some of his earlier non-Birdman work).  This is a dude that’s in the WWE Hall Of Fame and I can’t for the life of me figure out why.  He was essentially a jobber that never rose above mid-card status.

Dude would come to the ring with his bird Frankie (who died in a tragic fire a few years back… no shit).  On top of that, he’s probably most well known for singing the title track of the epic 1987 album Piledriver.  If you’ve never seen pictures of him and the late Owen Hart teamed up to form a tag team called High Energy you owe it to yourself to click on this link: High Energy.

In any case, I was perusing Wiki this evening and ran across this little nugget that made me smile:

“At the Survivor Series in 1990, Koko became the first wrestler to fall victim to The Undertaker’s Tombstone Piledriver in the Undertaker’s debut match.”

That right there is fucking cool.  Finally a reason to like The Birdman!

Chewie Professional Wrestling High Energy, Koko B. Ware, Owen Hart, piledriver, Survivor Series, Tombstone, Undertaker

Event: WrestleMania VI
Date: April 1, 1990
Venue: SkyDome (Toronto, Ontario)
Attendance: 67,287

From the very beginning of this DVD you know you’re in for something special.  The intro is a voice over by Vince REALLY turning it on.  Images of a celestial Hogan and Warrior are shown and Vince booms about the “Ultimate Challenge”.  Gorilla and Jesse are back once again (though Ventura is sans mustache).  As we’re in Toronto, Bob Goulet sings the Canadian national anthem.  It’s weird to start a WrestleMania event without America The Beautiful.

Rick Martel defeated Koko B. Ware
This is a battle of terrible characters.  Koko’s one of my least favorite wrestlers of all time and The Model while a pretty decent wrestler he was never able to get over in my book.  Koko hits an early cross body and nearly gets the pin.  That said, he looks like a moron cause he’s clapping all the time.  Stop Koko… you look like a douche.  Model takes control when he throw Koko over the top rope.  He then follows up with a terrible looking double axe handle off the top.  Martel slaps on the Boston Crab and Koko quickly taps out.

WWF Tag Team Championship
Demolition (Ax and Smash) defeated The Colossal Connection (André the Giant and Haku) (c) (with Bobby Heenan)
Prior to the match we get a backstage interview with Mene Gene where he refers to the Connection as “The Colostomy Connection”.  That right there’s funny.  Gorilla makes a reference to a “Three-peat”.  This is right after when Pat Riley has trademarked the phrase.  Andre is in REALLY bad shape at this point and he essentially stands on the apron the entire match.  Even when Haku gains the upper hand he doesn’t tag Andre.  In retrospect this is probably two fold as Andre is a wreck plus it’s a nice tie in for the storyline.  Things go to hell and Andre comes into the ring.  He hold Smash so Haku can super kick him and he nails Andre instead.  Naturally, Andre gets tied up in the ropes (which he always does).  Demolition hits their finisher on Haku to take the titles.  Bobby Heenan is pissed at Andre after the match and slaps Andre.  This begins the final face turn for the Giant.  Andre rides out a hero of his last WrestleMania match (though he would go on to make a couple of appearances).

Earthquake (with Jimmy Hart) defeated Hercules
As Earthquake does his pre-match interview, you can hear Hercules’ music in the background.  I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again… How does Earthquake have a job?  He’s a complete slob.  At this point, Earthquake is undefeated and according to Gorilla has sent 28 men to the hospitals.  Wow, I didn’t realize there were that many jobbers in the WWF!  Has Hercules EVER been above mid card status?  It’s too bad cause I really enjoyed him.  He’s a much better “big man” than most.  We start out with the classic “test of strength” back and forth.  A while later Hercules goes for his back breaker finisher… come on dude.  You know better than that.  Earthquake keeps “flexing” which pisses me off every time he does it.  I mean ol CHEWIE here has better arms that this dude.  Earthquake ends it with his “Balls To The Face” finisher.  Ugh.

At this point we get an interview with Miss Elizabeth talking about how she’s been away from wrestling for a while.  She says that she’s been working with the WWF in an advisory roll but that she’s been thinking about coming back to ringside.  She says that if she does return to ringside, “You’ll see a much more active Liz.”  So… we can pretty much guarantee that Liz will get involved somehow in the Macho match later in the show.

Brutus Beefcake defeated Mr. Perfect (with The Genius)
Before the next match we get a backstage interview with Beefcake.  Beefcake gets the upper hand early and he’s really putting it to Perfect.  Curt sells better than anyone in the history of the sport.  Perfect slows it down and we go into some good back and forth stuff for a couple of minutes.  Beefcake calls for the sleeper but the Genius gets up on the apron and drops his scroll.  Perfect nails Beefcake with his and gains the momentum in the match.  Gorilla notes that the pendulum has swung 360 degrees and Jesse corrects him… hilarious.  Beefcake slingshots Perfect into the corner and he hits the post “knocking him out”.  Beefcake gets the win ending the “perfect” streak.  The Genius runs into the ring and steals the clippers that Beefcake was going to use on Perfect.  Of course, The Genius gets a sleeper and a haircut for his trouble.

Roddy Piper and Bad News Brown fought to a double countout
Before the next match we get a nice recap.  Piper’s painted himself half black which always cracked me up.  Total WTF moment for sure.  He totally sounds like a 5 pack/day smoker the way he’s wheezing during this interview.  No entrance for Bad News on the DVD.  Ventura makes a crack about how someday he’s going to be president… close but not quite Governor.  Gorilla says (as he always does) that THIS is the best WrestleMania in history.  After getting slammed into the turnbuckle a few times, Piper “Pipes Up” and makes a nice comeback.  There’s almost no wrestling at all in this match.  After another beat down, Piper gains the upper hand once again by going with a poke to the eye.  Piper then goes into his tights for a “glove” which the ref apparently doesn’t care about.  This mercifully ends with a double countout and both men continue to fight all the way to the back.  This was a pretty piss poor match… feel free to skip over it.

The Hart Foundation (Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart) defeated The Bolsheviks (Nikolai Volkoff and Boris Zhukov)
Silly little vignette backstage with the Bolsheviks before the match which lasts longer than the match itself.  The Harts attack while Volkoff sings his national anthem.  They throw him out of the ring and hit Zhukov with their finisher for a super quick win.  AWESOME.

The Barbarian (with Bobby Heenan) defeated Tito Santana
Good lord… Arriba!  Tito’s playing the “weak” guy but he’s pretty ripped up here as well.  The Barbarian does look awesome but he’s still nothing compared to the roided up muscle heads of today (Batista, HHH, etc.)  A big boot to the face puts Tito down but he manages to come back and hit a pretty damn good looking forearm to the face.  He would have won the match if it wasn’t for Bobby putting Barb’s foot on the ropes before the three count.  A few minutes later, Barbarian hits a clothesline off the top rope that nearly turns Tito inside out.  Easy pin at that point.

Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire (with Miss Elizabeth) defeated Randy Savage and Sensational Queen Sherri
At this point in his career, Dusty is doing the “common man” gig.  He’s all kinds of crazy.  Macho out first with Sheri by his side.  It’s really weird to see him without Liz there… hmm.  I wonder if she’ll return today?  I would really be a coincidence seeing as she did that interview previously.  Rhodes and Sapphire hit the ring announced as weighing in at 465.  Yeah… right.  Seriously, where in the FUCK did they find this woman and why is she wrestling?  She’s one step removed from Gabourey Sidibe in Precious.  Anyhow, Liz makes her “surprise” appearance and is in the corner of Rhodes and Sapphire for the match.  Quick start to the match and Dusty takes advantage after catching Savage off the top.  The women come in and Sapphire quite literally bounces around for a couple of minutes.  She goes for an airplane spin on Sherri… an AIRPLANE SPIN.  Sherri comes back and goes for an ill-times body slam which of course she can’t complete.  The guys come back in and Savage takes over.  He hits a double axe handle off the top twice and Dusty is in big trouble.  Sapphire comes to his aid and Savage tosses her aside.  Liz comes over to help step in the way.  Savage hits Rhodes with his king scepter but doesn’t go for the cover.  Sapphire is a complete waste here but does manage to throw Sherri out of the ring.  Liz dumps her back in, pulls Sherri’s hair and allows Sapphire to get the pin.  Liz, Dusty and Sapphire “dance” after the match.  Absolutely piss poor wrestling but mildly entertaining for that “car wreck” factor.

At this point we get a few interview segments.  Jesse and Gorilla talking about some “adult footage”, Sherri and Macho King essentially yelling at the camera, Demolition talking about their big win and how the Hart Foundation are waiting for them.  Next up is Hogan.  Pretty typical stuff here what with Hulkamania running wild and all.  Hogan does say that its not whether you win or lose but what kind of winner or loser you are.  I had never caught this before so knowing what I know it was a pretty interesting statement.  Over to the Warrior for his interview.  He’s basically on acid at this point talking about living forever, beliefs and how Hulkamania can live through the Warrior.

The Orient Express (Sato and Tanaka) (with Mr. Fuji) defeated The Rockers (Shawn Michaels and Marty Jannetty) by countout
The Orient Express comes to the ring, you can totally tell that Gorilla isn’t interesting in this match.  The Rockers come down and Shawn is starting to get quite a bit bigger.  Who the hell are the Orient Express?  Anyhow, Shawn takes over but he’s obviously not “HBK” quite yet.  Tanaka get a kick to Shawn’s back and Shawn goes face in peril for a few minutes.  Finally Shawn makes a big tag and Jannetty cleans house.  The Rockers go up to the top to hit their tandem dropkicks off the top but Fuji grabs Jannetty’s leg and then hits him with the dreaded “salt to the eyes”.  Marty sells it like he’s got daggers in his eyes and literally walks OVER the guardrail into the crowd getting counted out in the process.

Jim Duggan defeated Dino Bravo (with Jimmy Hart and Earthquake)
Hacksaw comes to the ring and he’s sticking with the USA chant.  Someone should tell ol Duggan that he’s is in Toronto.  This one isn’t worth watching nor is it worth recapping.  Duggan gets the win when Jimmy throws the 2×4 to Bravo but Duggan grabs it and nails him with it.  Duggan gets his ass beat after the match by Earthquake complete with the “balls to the face” finisher.  Total snoozefest.

Million Dollar Championship
Ted DiBiase (c) (with Virgil) defeated Jake Roberts by countout
The Million Dollar belt is on the line here for the first and I believe only time.  Jake goes for a quick win with the DDT after about 12 seconds.  DiBiase is out of the ring quickly.  Jake goes for it a couple more times in the next minute or so.  He gets frustrated and decides to slow things down and takes over with a hammer lock.  Million Dollar Man takes over after Jake makes a mistake and really slows down the tempo.  The fans get a wave going in the arena.  Silly Canadians.  That said, it doesn’t say much for what they think of the match.  DiBiase hits a pile driver but doesn’t go for the cover right away.  He hooks in the Million Dollar Dream and it looks like it’s going to be over.  Jake makes it to the ropes.  DiBiase stays on him and after a couple of near falls, he goes to the top ropes but gets caught.  Jake takes over and signals for the DDT.  Virgil pulls Jake out of the ring before he can slap it on and DiBiase follows him out.  Virgil dumps Million Dollar Man back in and Jake gets counted out.  After the match, Virgil grabs the Million Dollar belt and takes off.  Jake finally sinks in the DDT and plants DiBiase right in the middle of the ring.  Virgil comes back to save the day before Jake can drape Damien over Million Dollar Man.  Decent little match even though it was a bit predictable.

The Big Boss Man defeated Akeem (with Slick)
Million Dollar Man is still out after getting his DDT in the previous match and he proceeds to beat the hell out of Big Boss Man before the match starts.  Akeem then comes down and proceeds to continue the beating for the first couple of minutes of the match.  Boss Man reverses it and sends him back and forth between the turnbuckles multiple times and then hits his sidewalk slam finisher (always loved that move!) for the win.

A waste of a segment follows with Sean Mooney, Mary Tyler Moore and Rhythm and Blues  (Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine).  The Bushwackers come out and beat the hell out of… the instruments.  Fast forward.

Rick Rude (with Bobby Heenan) defeated Jimmy Snuka
Snuka literally struts like a chicken on his way to the ring.  This is a nice little match with some good back and forth action.  Snuka misses off the second rope and Rude hits his finisher for the victory.  Speaking of nice finishers… this one always looked BRUTAL.  Not sure how he didn’t kill someone doing it.

WWF Intercontinental Championship and WWF Championship
The Ultimate Warrior (Intercontinental Champion) defeated Hulk Hogan (WWF Champion)
This is one of my Top 10 Favorite WrestleMania matches of all time!  Warrior walks to the ring which he never does.  Hogan does his typical entrance.  A classic back and forth “test of strength” at the beginning of the match.  Need to show just how even they really are.  Warrior wins the knuckle showdown and it totally looks like Hogan’s BLOWING the Warrior.  Of course, Hogan makes his way back to his feet and takes the upper hand.  In a beautiful juvenile twist, now Hogan’s getting the suck job.  After all of this, they do some criss crossing in the ring and take turns slamming one another.  Warrior puts Hogan over the top and Hogan busts up his knee.  After about 2 minutes, Hogan takes over and is walking fine.  The crowd is totally behind Hogan and he’s in control of the match using some rest holds.  Jess talks about how they are “wear down” holds… No shit Jesse.  Classic double clothesline and Warrior comes out on top.  Warrior goes to the rope shake and hits a couple of big clotheslines on Hogan.  Bearhug after that to take a break.  Hogan’s arm drops twice and Hogan comes back.  Ref gets bumped and Warrior hits 2 double axe handles and then misses his shoulder block.  Hogan covers Warrior and has him pinned for like a day.  Warrior hits a back suplex and pins Hogan for the same day.  Warrior finally hits a weak gorilla press followed by a huge splash and we’ve got a ref to make the count.  Hogan kicks out and “Hulks Up”.  He hits the big boot but misses the leg drop finisher.  Warrior follows with a splash to get the victory.  Hogan hands the belt to the Warrior and they hug it out to show good sportsmanship.  OUTSTANDING match!

General Thoughts

• I love it when Gorilla talks about “winner’s money” and “loser’s money”.  This is obviously WAY before the concept of a “smart” wrestling fan.
• During this show, it’s announced that WrestleMania VII will be held at the L.A. Memorial Coliseum.  In actuality it was held at the L.A. Memorial Sports Arena.
• Did Tito Santana ever win a singles match at WrestleMania?
• I totally don’t remember Hogan hurting himself in the title match.  In my memory he put Warrior over clean in the ring.
• This is the last time that Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura hosted together.

Chewie The WrestleMania Project Akeem, Andre The Giant, Ax, Bad News Brown, Bobby Heenan, Boris Zhukov, Bret Hart, Brutus Beefcake, Demolition, Dino Bravo, Dusty Rhodes, Earthquake, Gabourey Sidibe, Gorilla Monsoon, Haku, Hercules, Hulk Hogan, Intercontinental Championship, Jake Roberts, Jesse Ventura, Jim Duggan, Jim Neidhart, Jimmy Hart, Jimmy Snuka, Koko B. Ware, Marty Jannetty, Million Dollar Championship, Miss Elizabeth, Mr. Fuji, Mr. Perfect, Nikolai Volkoff, Precious, Randy Savage, Rick Martel, Rick Rude, Robert Goulet, Roddy Piper, Sapphire, Sato, Sensational Queen Sherri, Shawn Michaels, Slick, Smash, Tanaka, Ted DiBiase, The Barbarian, The Big Boss Man, The Bolsheviks, The Colossal Connection, The Genius, The Hart Foundation, The Orient Express, The Rockers, The Ultimate Warrior, Tito Santana, Virgil, WWF Championship

I’m sure this is way old and everyone has seen this before, but I got this sent to me the other day via email and it once again struck a chord.  This is a commercial that Budweiser aired during the 2002 Super Bowl just a few months after the 9/11 terrorist attacks.  This commercial has only been aired once because Budweiser didn’t want to financially benefit from it.  (Snopes article about the video)

I lived in Washington on that day so I remember very well what it was like.  Just because we’re a few years removed from that tragedy PLEASE don’t ever forget.  Let’s Roll…

Chewie Videos 9/11, Budweiser, commercial, September 11th, Super Bowl, video

I’m sorry to say that I had to make a very unexpected and sad trip back to Indiana yesterday.  Pip’s Mom who I will always remember as Swami lost her battle with cancer and passed away on Saturday morning.

I’m happy to say that there were literally hundreds of people there to celebrate this wonderful woman.  Through the tears and laughter is became once again apparent to me just what a wonderful woman Claudia was.  Hearing stories from people from all times in her life was an absolute treat.  There was so much love in that room and it was all for Swami.

Rest in peace Swami.  You will be missed and never forgotten.  Thank you for everything that you gave of yourself and thank you for touching so many lives.  Love you lady.

Chewie Pics From 406 Swami

Going to drop out of “character” here for a moment and just write…  As you know one of my best friends on this earth is Pip and I love him like a brother.  That love extends to his family and especially his mom who I affectionately refer to as “Swami”.

To make a long story very short, Swami isn’t doing all that well these days.  I (like Pip) am not one to ask for prayers from others, but if you’ve got some to share please send them out.  She could definitely use them.

Thew, Richard, Lauren… I said it before and I’ll say it again.  If you need anything say the word and I’ll be there in a matter of hours.  Believe me when I say that it’s not just lip service.

Get well soon Swam… love ya.

Chewie Pics From 406 prayers, Swami

It’s been a while since I’ve posted a Pic From 406 and I figured this was just the thing to “get me back in the game” so to speak.  While we’re much more mature and grown up these days (OK maybe not all of us) I ran across this picture on the hard drive and it literally made me laugh out loud.

I don’t remember the exact circumstances (shocking) but seeing Buford holding his beer aloft in what I can only describe as “praise” is awesome.  We’re certainly getting older but it’s memories like these that will keep my 406 days right at the top of the list.

Chewie Pics From 406 406, beer, Buford, college

I picked this one up at the library after hearing about it on Kevin Smith’s Smodcast a while back.  I’m kind of a trivia junkie so I figured I’d really enjoy this.  Essentially (as the tile suggests) these are little nuggets of information that are pretty much universally thought of as “truth” when in reality they’re complete bullshit.  It’s an interesting read if you enjoy tidbits of info such as:

• How many moons does the earth have?  At least 7.
• The hottest part of a chili?  It’s the central membrane.
• A jalapeno = 4,500 SHUs (Scoville Heat Units) which means it needs to be watered down 4,500 times until you can’t taste it any more.
• The hottest chili is a “dorset” which chimes in at 923,000 SHU – holy shit!
• What effect does alcohol have on bran cells?  It doesn’t actually kill them (YEA!!!)  In fact, it just makes new ones grow less quickly.
• A hangover actually comes from the brain shrinking due to dehydration.  The brain itself feels no pain… it’s actually the membrane around the brain.

A couple of hundred pages of stuff like that.  Some are more interesting than others for sure but it definitely held my interest.  My one big bitch was that there was many times way too much info about a particular nugget of info.  For example telling me that Columbus did not in fact discover America but some other dude did is kind of cool.  Going on for a page and a half about said dude’s back story and where Columbus actually landed was not.

Some folks may really like this.  For me there were some interesting stuff and other stuff that I just skipped over.  Definitely a good bathroom book!

Chewie Book Reviews chili, hangover, jalapeno, Kevin Smith, trivia

Event: WrestleMania V
Date: April 2, 1989
Venue: Trump Plaza (Atlantic City, New Jersey)
Attendance: 18,946

For the second year in a row, WrestleMania is being held at the Trump Plaza.  This is also the second event in the anthology that goes to two DVDs.  After a WrestleMania IV card that had 16 matches, the WWF followed up with a 14 match card… that seemed to last FOREVER.  That’s not to say that there aren’t any gems in here cause there are.  Unfortunately we get off a really rocky start with current WWF Women’s Champion Rockin Robin singing America The Beautiful.  Two words… fucking brutal.

Hercules defeated King Haku (with Bobby Heenan)
The opening bout is former Heenan Family member Hercules vs. King Haku.  Bobby Heenan gets on the mic before the match begins and tells the crowd to get on their feet for the King.  My response to this is if he’s so damn good why the hell is he in the opening match?  This isn’t a bad match for what it is.  Pretty clean throughout and Hercules seems to have learned from his slip-up at WrestleMania IV and bridges out of a double pin at the last second to get the victory.

The Twin Towers (Akeem and The Big Boss Man) (with Slick) defeated The Rockers (Shawn Michaels and Marty Jannetty)
Up next is the first time that Mr. WrestleMania Shawn Michaels is on a WrestleMania card as part of the Rockers.  Akeem is absolutely laughable.  The “African Dream”?  Really?  Who at the WWF thought turning the One Man Gang into a jive talking African Queen was a good idea?  In any case, the Rockers actually put up a decent fight for a good long while with some great quick tag team wrestling.  The end comes very quickly though when Shawn Michaels goes off the top rope and gets power bombed.  Holy shit.  Throw in a splash from the over sized Akeem and I’m surprised he ever got up from that one.

Brutus Beefcake and Ted DiBiase (with Virgil) fought to a double countout
Beefcake is the “Barber” at this point and I could never get over how bad his HAIR was.  I suppose that’s the definition of irony huh?  In any case, Brutus is having a bad hair day against the well coiffed Million Dollar Man.  I do have to say that I LOVE me some double clothesline.  Every time I see one I geek out like a total mark.  DiBiase gets the Million Dollar Dream on Beefcake but he makes it to the ring and we get a pretty weak double countout.  Beefcake the proceeds to get Virgil in the sleeper to end the madness.  Waste of time.

The Bushwhackers (Luke Williams and Butch Miller) defeated The Fabulous Rougeaus (Jacques and Raymond) (with Jimmy Hart)
Before the next match, we get a package where we’re shown Luke and Butch eating like a couple of idiots.  I suppose this is in here to show us just how “crazy” they are but it’s a complete waste of time.  The match isn’t much better either.  The Rougeaus are now heels going against the “power” that is the Bushwhackers.  Ho hum.  There’s one pretty humorous moment here when Butch (or Luke I can never tell which) gets body slammed and grabs a handful of one of the Rougeaus’ nut sack.  Hilarious.  A couple of minutes later the Rougeaus celebrate prematurely and get beaten by the Bushwhackers finishing move… a double stomach buster.  Um… kay.

Mr. Perfect defeated The Blue Blazer
Mr. Perfect makes his way down to the ring with no music which sucks cause his music is one of my favorite themes of all time.  He actually slips on his way down to the ring which is ironic seeing that he’s “perfect”.  The Blazer looks awesome here in the early going.  Damn do I miss Owen.  Blazer has the advantage and goes to the top for a big splash.  Perfect brings the knees up at the last second for a BRUTAL looking collision.  Not sure how you can “fake” that one.  Even after that mishap, Blazer manages to take control over most of the match.  After a really close call, Blazer pleads with the ref and turns around right into a Henning forearm.  Perfect follows up wit the Pefect-plex for the victory.

WWF Tag Team Championship
Demolition (Ax and Smash) (c) defeated The Powers of Pain (The Warlord and The Barbarian) and Mr. Fuji
Before the match gets started we’re shown a vignette of Fuji running a 5k.  We follow that up with Run DMC and the “WrestleMania Rap”???  Gorilla says that a little bit of rap goes a long way.  In this instance I have to totally agree with him.  The WWF typically does some sort of “filler” during the big show but this is crazy.  The match itself is about what you’d expect from 4 big guys and a run down Master Fuji.  Some good back and forth between Demolition and P.O.P. with Fuji only getting involved when Demolition is completely beat down and then out quickly.  The end comes when Fuji goes to the good ol ceremonial salt in the eyes gimmick and it backfires when he gets his own man.  Demolition takes advantage and hits their “finisher that wouldn’t hurt but looks cool” on Fuji for the win to retain their titles.

Dino Bravo (with Frenchy Martin) defeated Ronnie Garvin
Next up is Garvin and Bravo with a random appearance by Jimmy Snuka.  He’s on his way back to the fed and apparently Vince wants to send him out so folks can remember what he looks like.  The match itself is a good fair match.  Garvin is going crazy with the cradles… inside cradle, sunset flip attempts, etc.  At one point Bravo goes for the gayest looking bear hug in the history of wrestling.  Bravo hits a side suplex out of nowhere for the win.  After the match, Ronnie gets the “Garvin Stomp” on Frenchie in a typical “face loses but has to get revenge on the manager” moment.

The Brain Busters (Arn Anderson and Tully Blanchard) (with Bobby Heenan) defeated Strike Force (Rick Martel and Tito Santana)
Even after all of these years, its still weird to see Blanchard and Anderson in the WWF – they’ll always be WCW guys (and Horseman at that) to me.  Strikeforce is back together for the first time in quite a while but have everything running smoothly at the beginning of the match.  Nice little side by side dropkicks send the Busters to the floor.  A while later Strikeforce gets a double figure four right in the middle which is really cool visually but Arn breaks up with a rake to the eye.  Tito fucks up and hits Martel with the flying burrito (forearm) which sends Martel outside.  Martel selling it like Tito took his head off.  Time for a totally telegraphed heel turn.  Tito is getting double teamed and Martel is still on the outside hurting.  Martel refuses to extend the arm to take the tag and eventually leaves Tito in the ring to fend for himself.  Tito gets his ass kicked for another couple of minutes before getting hit with a spike piledriver.  I’ve got to say that Tito pretty much carries the match here.  Well done Chico.  We get a post match interview with Martel who’s always been terrible on the mic and this is no exception.

At this point we get an in-ring segment with Brother Love, Morton Downey Jr. and Roddy Piper.  Downey is smoking on the way to the ring which is king of funny.  Downey and Brother Love go at each other for a couple of minutes and then Piper makes his way to the ring.  Brother Love just kind of disappears.  This ends with Downey blowing smoke in Piper’s face, Piper getting pissed and spraying him with a fire extinguisher.  I remember this being much cooler than it was.

After the Piper/Downey thing we’re shown a preview of the Hulk Hogan “classic” No Holds Barred.  We might as well rename it the “Hulk Hogan Federation” at this point.  I mean, is there ANY chance in hell that he’s going to lose the main even with Vince so far up his ass?  Gene nearly laughs when he says how this movie is going to be a “blockbuster”.  After that segment, Jesse Ventura is all fired up about how Hogan is coming to Hollywood because it’s “his” town.

We get a pretty decent recap of the Mega Powers at this point.  Nothing out of the ordinary, but one really interesting nugget here.  During Hogan’s interview they actually overdub his voice when he says “WWF” so it says “WWE”.  Are you kidding me?

Jake Roberts defeated André the Giant (with Bobby Heenan) by disqualification
Big John Stud is the special guest referee for this match.  Andre is still a heel at this point after his WrestleMania III and WrestleMania IV Hogan encounters.  Looking at this now it’s really sad.  I’ve always been a big Jake fan but this seems like a big step down for Andre.  Andre is really looking bad at this point in his career as he can barely move around the ring.  At one point Andre gets hooked in the ropes (as he always does).  If there’s ever been a signature move in wrestling, this is it.  The entire match Jake is going for the bag to try and get Damien.  The end of this match turns into a complete clusterfuck.  Andre and Stud get into it, DiBiase grabs the bag and hightails it, Jake goes after DiBiase, blah blah blah.  Damien finally makes his appearance and Andre takes off out of the ring.  Pussy.  Seriously are we supposed to believe that Andre is scared of a snake?  Dude would eat it in like two bites.

The Hart Foundation (Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart) defeated The Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine (with Jimmy Hart)
This is pre “Rhythm & Blues” for Honky and Hammer but in retrospect you can see it coming.  Even after all of these years Honky sells an atomic drop better than anyone in history.  The Foundation is running on all cylinders with some great tag wrestling.  Hart slingshots Anvil in over the top right into the bad guys.  Actually Anvil looks incredible here and actually pulls out a standing drop kick?!?!?  I don’t care what you say, that’s damn impressive for a guy that size.  The end comes when Anvil throws Jimmy Hart’s megaphone to Bret who nails Honky with it.  Here’s a question… what do you think the lifetime average of the megaphone is?  Might be time to leave that one in the locker room there Jimmy.

WWF Intercontinental Championship
Rick Rude (with Bobby Heenan) defeated The Ultimate Warrior (c)
Before this match we’re shown footage of the Rude/Warrior pose down at the Royal Rumble that set this match up.  God damn is Rude ripped up.  Rude’s got some sweet tights complete with the IC title already on them.  Warrior hits the ring and we’re off and running.  Warrior is manhandling Rude whipping him into the corners really hard.  Rude selling like a motherfucker.  Warrior goes right into a bear hug to slow things down.  Remember people… Warrior’s got all kinds of charisma, but can’t wrestle worth a shit.  Rude breaks the hold with fingers to the eyes and follows up with a huge dropkick off the top that looks great.  Warrior powers out before the one count and goes into multiple body slams followed by another bear hug.  Warrior goes for a big splash in the middle of the ring and Rude gets his knees up right in the breadbasket.  Rude tries to swivel his hips a couple of time and just can’t do it cause his back is injured.  End comes when Rude gets dumped out of the ring.  Warrior goes to suplex him back into the ring.  Mid-suplex, Heenan grabs the Warrior’s leg which causes Rude to fall on Warrior.  Bobby holds on to the Warrrior’s leg so he can’t kick out and Rude gets the title.  Beat down on The Weasel post match.

Jim Duggan and Bad News Brown fought to a double disqualification
This is essentially a throwaway match and I’m shocked that it’s so late on the card.  There’s essentially not one wrestling hold here at all and by the time the match is over we’ve got bats and chairs in the ring.  Are we really supposed the believe that Bad News is a bad ass?  Not so much.

The Red Rooster defeated Bobby Heenan (with The Brooklyn Brawler)
If the last match was “essentially” a throwaway then this one is completely a throwaway.  My only question is who in the hell did Red Rooster piss off to be booked against Bobby Heenan?  Actually, I’ve got another question as well.  Who did he blow to be booked second to last on the card?  This one is nothing that you wouldn’t expect.  Rooster pins Heenan a couple of minutes in and then for some reason celebrates.  Not sure why he’s happy.  Perhaps no one told him he’s got a red mohawk and is wrestling as a farm animal.  Brooklyn Brawler beats on Rooster after the match.

WWF Championship
Hulk Hogan defeated Randy Savage (c)
This one made my list of Top 10 WrestleMania matches and watching it again totally validated that pick.  Savage comes out first complete with theme music and pose down.  Liz gets her own entrance with music as she’s not supposed to be in either man’s corner (though she still has Macho’s music).  Ventura points out that the champ should enter the ring last I being the old school dork I am I completely agree with him.  The crowd is totally behind Hogan from the get go.  Hogan starts out with the dreaded “closed fists” and Savage follows up with his standard double axe handle.  Hogan takes over after throwing Savage out of the ring.  He follows up with a couple of elbow drops (though not the Savage variety) and an eye rake.  A few minutes later, Savage takes over and Hogan is bleeding above the eye.  I’ve seen this match a hundred times and I just didn’t remember Hogan bleeding here.  Savage does some showboating and allows Hogan back into it.  Hogan slams Savage over the top and Liz goes over to help.  Savage playing the heel shrugs her off.  Hogan gets the advantage again and goes to slam Savage against the post on the outside and Liz steps in the way.  A few moments later Hogan is down and hurt and Liz comes to HIS aid.  Finally the bullshit love triangle ends and referee Dave Hebner sends her away from ringside.  Time to get down to some wrestling.  Savage hits the double axe handle on Hogan as he’s draped across the guardrail.  Hogan chokes a la Rick Steamboat.  Macho then continues with the choking tactics using tape from his wrists.  Macho then hits the HUGE elbow right in the middle of the ring.  Hogan “Hulks up” out of nowhere: block, punch, shake head, point, punch, punch, punch, slam, leg drop victory.  Real American and the crowd goes home happy.  A-W-E-S-O-M-E!

General Thoughts

• This is a LONG show.  This wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t for so much throwaway garbage that we’ve been given.  These backstage vignettes have GOT to stop.  I’d much rather have a 3 hour show full of action rather than a 4 hours show with an hour of crap thrown in for filler.
• If I was in the arena I’d be pissed.  If you don’t count the Piper/Downey segment there was over a half hour between in ring action.  That’s unacceptable.
• With the exception of Perfect/Blazer and Savage/Hogan this is a pretty lackluster show.  That said, if you’re at all an old-school Hogan fan, you NEED to see this one.

Chewie The WrestleMania Project Akeem, Andre The Giant, Arn Anderson, Atlantic City, Ax, Bad News Brown, Big John Studd, Bobby Heenan, Bret Hart, Brutus Beefcake, Butch Miller, Dave Hebner, Demolition, Dino Bravo, Frenchy Martin, Gorilla Monsoon, Greg Valentine, Hercules, Hulk Hogan, Intercontinental Championship, Jacques, Jake Roberts, Jesse Ventura, Jim Duggan, Jim Neidhart, Jimmy Hart, King Haku, Luke Williams, Marty Jannetty, Mean Gene Okerlund, Mega Powers, Mr. Fuji, Mr. Perfect, New Jersey, Randy Savage, Raymond, Rick Martel, Rick Rude, Ronnie Garvin, Shawn Michaels, Slick, Smash, Strike Force, Ted DiBiase, The Barbarian, The Big Boss Man, The Blue Blazer, The Brain Busters, The Brooklyn Brawler, The Bushwhackers, The Fabulous Rougeaus, The Hart Foundation, The Honky Tonk Man, The Powers of Pain, The Red Rooster, The Rockers, The Twin Towers, The Ultimate Warrior, The Warlord, Tito Santana, Trump Plaza, Tully Blanchard, Virgil, WWF Championship

G got done with breakfast early this morning and went off to get ready for school.  Mom went upstairs to get herself ready so Super Dad was left to contend with the C-man who wasn’t quite finished with his waffles (complete with powdered sugar).

I turned my back for a second (stupid move dad) and when I turned back around C had his plate (once again complete with powdered sugar) on his head.  I tell you what… I love this boy but I think he’s destined for the short bus one of these days.

He was having such a great time giggling to himself that I couldn’t help but laugh.  I decided to grab my phone and take a picture of him and I was lucky enough to get this “in action” shot of him getting ready to launch his fork across the kitchen as he’s prone to do.  This signifies to mom and dad that the meal is now over.

We followed up this meal with some leftover chili and cornbread for lunch.  Ever see a near 2 year old with cornbread eyebrows?  I have   Love you C-man!

Chewie Kids Do The Damndest Things C-man, Super Dad

From the “I couldn’t make this up” file.

As I was talking to the G-man this morning I asked him what he wanted to eat for dinner.  Like it was no big thing, he calmly replied, “Broccoli and champagne”.

That’s my boy.

Chewie Kids Do The Damndest Things G-man